diff --git a/Doc/Misc/AnimatedCharacters-HowTo.txt b/Doc/HowTo/AnimatedCharacters-HowTo.txt similarity index 100% rename from Doc/Misc/AnimatedCharacters-HowTo.txt rename to Doc/HowTo/AnimatedCharacters-HowTo.txt diff --git a/Doc/Misc/ConfigSyntax.txt b/Doc/HowTo/ConfigSyntax.txt similarity index 100% rename from Doc/Misc/ConfigSyntax.txt rename to Doc/HowTo/ConfigSyntax.txt diff --git a/Doc/Misc/DefinesValidator.txt b/Doc/HowTo/DefinesValidator.txt similarity index 100% rename from Doc/Misc/DefinesValidator.txt rename to Doc/HowTo/DefinesValidator.txt diff --git a/Doc/Misc/MirrorFlipRotateToDegrees.jpg b/Doc/HowTo/MirrorFlipRotateToDegrees.jpg similarity index 100% rename from Doc/Misc/MirrorFlipRotateToDegrees.jpg rename to Doc/HowTo/MirrorFlipRotateToDegrees.jpg diff --git a/Doc/OutlinedGraphicsHowTo/Char.xcf b/Doc/HowTo/OutlinedGraphics/Char.xcf similarity index 100% rename from Doc/OutlinedGraphicsHowTo/Char.xcf rename to Doc/HowTo/OutlinedGraphics/Char.xcf diff --git a/Doc/OutlinedGraphicsHowTo/CharExample-HowToConvert.txt b/Doc/HowTo/OutlinedGraphics/CharExample-HowToConvert.txt similarity index 100% rename from Doc/OutlinedGraphicsHowTo/CharExample-HowToConvert.txt rename to Doc/HowTo/OutlinedGraphics/CharExample-HowToConvert.txt diff --git a/Doc/OutlinedGraphicsHowTo/Humanoid.xcf b/Doc/HowTo/OutlinedGraphics/Humanoid.xcf similarity index 100% rename from Doc/OutlinedGraphicsHowTo/Humanoid.xcf rename to Doc/HowTo/OutlinedGraphics/Humanoid.xcf diff --git a/Doc/OutlinedGraphicsHowTo/Item.xcf b/Doc/HowTo/OutlinedGraphics/Item.xcf similarity index 100% rename from Doc/OutlinedGraphicsHowTo/Item.xcf rename to Doc/HowTo/OutlinedGraphics/Item.xcf diff --git a/Doc/OutlinedGraphicsHowTo/char.pcx b/Doc/HowTo/OutlinedGraphics/char.pcx similarity index 100% rename from Doc/OutlinedGraphicsHowTo/char.pcx rename to Doc/HowTo/OutlinedGraphics/char.pcx diff --git a/Doc/OutlinedGraphicsHowTo/humanoid.pcx b/Doc/HowTo/OutlinedGraphics/humanoid.pcx similarity index 100% rename from Doc/OutlinedGraphicsHowTo/humanoid.pcx rename to Doc/HowTo/OutlinedGraphics/humanoid.pcx diff --git a/Doc/OutlinedGraphicsHowTo/item.pcx b/Doc/HowTo/OutlinedGraphics/item.pcx similarity index 100% rename from Doc/OutlinedGraphicsHowTo/item.pcx rename to Doc/HowTo/OutlinedGraphics/item.pcx diff --git a/Doc/Misc/SaveGameImportingOldVersion.txt b/Doc/HowTo/SaveGameImportingOldVersion.txt similarity index 100% rename from Doc/Misc/SaveGameImportingOldVersion.txt rename to Doc/HowTo/SaveGameImportingOldVersion.txt diff --git a/Doc/Lore/Fiction/Attnam.txt b/Doc/Lore/Fiction/Attnam.txt new file mode 100644 index 000000000..8a42c3564 --- /dev/null +++ b/Doc/Lore/Fiction/Attnam.txt @@ -0,0 +1,61 @@ +Attnam, the Holy City of Valpuri +-------------------------------- + +Geographical information + +Attnam is a relatively small city located in a thick evergreen forest called Pertturia, +where it acts as a capitol of the Holy Empire of Perttuania, that in turn controls all +of the Isle of Perttuera and is the world's 324th biggest sovereign state. The city is +physically quite isolated from the rest of the world, but the citizens don't mind it +all since almost all of them have high speed net connections. The oceanic coast is quite +near the border of the forest, however, and pilgrims wandering to the Cathedral and +traders delivering goods, luxury items and dolphin food for the clergy class are not +entirely uncommon in Attnam. + +Nature + +Nature is close in everyday life of Attnam, because civilization ends completely no +further than at the city gate (if it has ever even begun) and wilderness takes over. +The city guards are obligated to keep the area inside the city wall safe, but outside +wolves, lynxes and wild bears may roam freely. Settlement of goblins, ogres and mutant +school food mushrooms are also common. Even Enner Beasts have been heard wailing in +the darkness that covers the forest, but they, of course, are killed with magic +missiles if they ever wander closer than 500 yards to the city, in order to prevent +structural damage caused in the city. + +Sources of livelihood + +The citizens live mostly by hunting bears and such from the forest and whittling +sacred-looking items from wood that foreigners that seek truth and Valpuri's blessing +from Attnam buy eagerly as holy relics. The public expenditures of the state, e.g. +salaries of Überpriestial elite guards, cost of the enormous amounts of sacramental +Coke needed in the Cathedral and the price of replenishing Perttu's slave staff and +harem monthly, are funded almost entirely by a state-owned valpurium mine located in +the tundra section of Perttuera. + +Government + +Attnam and the Empire of Perttuania are officially ruled by Valpuri the Great Frog and +the King of Gods, but since He is quite often absent when decision are made, His Most +Pious Überpriest acts as a messenger who delivers His orders to mortal men from godly +planes. The Überpriest retains his position for his entire lifetime. When he dies, the +next leader is chosen immediately by the Valpuristic Conclave of High Priests, and is +almost always the one who killed the last Überpriest (although there seem to be some +other, not so popularily known requirements for this crowning). + +History + +The former headquarters of the Empire were located up in the tundra area of Perttuera +but were eaten by a swarm of angry polar bears in 913 Anno Valpurus. Attnam was founded +in the next year, and, as can be well guessed by looking the map, its place was decided +randomly by choosing the coordinates by dice-throwing. + +The first building to rise in Attnam was the Cathedral, which yet today looms over the +city as a symbol of Valpuri's might. The Überpriest of that day used much of his mighty +magical abilities to aid the building process and to protect it from the attacks of +wildeebeasts. So much that after the Cathedral and the city wall were finally up, he +was easily beaten in duel by Perttu, the nowaday Überpriest. Perttu moved to the +Cathedral immediately and started his reign by naming the country and all important +landmarks (Attnam was not considered as such) inside its borders after himself. And +during the following decades under his rule, Attnam has gradually become what it is +today. \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/Doc/Lore/Fiction/Creation.rtf b/Doc/Lore/Fiction/Creation.rtf new file mode 100644 index 000000000..9c237d2a7 --- /dev/null +++ b/Doc/Lore/Fiction/Creation.rtf @@ -0,0 +1,77 @@ +{\rtf1\ansi\ansicpg1252\uc1\deff0\stshfdbch0\stshfloch0\stshfhich0\stshfbi0\deflang1035\deflangfe1035{\fonttbl{\f0\froman\fcharset0\fprq2{\*\panose 02020603050405020304}Times New Roman;}{\f36\froman\fcharset238\fprq2 Times New Roman CE;} +{\f37\froman\fcharset204\fprq2 Times New Roman Cyr;}{\f39\froman\fcharset161\fprq2 Times New Roman Greek;}{\f40\froman\fcharset162\fprq2 Times New Roman Tur;}{\f41\froman\fcharset177\fprq2 Times New Roman (Hebrew);} +{\f42\froman\fcharset178\fprq2 Times New Roman (Arabic);}{\f43\froman\fcharset186\fprq2 Times New Roman Baltic;}{\f44\froman\fcharset163\fprq2 Times New Roman (Vietnamese);}}{\colortbl;\red0\green0\blue0;\red0\green0\blue255;\red0\green255\blue255; +\red0\green255\blue0;\red255\green0\blue255;\red255\green0\blue0;\red255\green255\blue0;\red255\green255\blue255;\red0\green0\blue128;\red0\green128\blue128;\red0\green128\blue0;\red128\green0\blue128;\red128\green0\blue0;\red128\green128\blue0; +\red128\green128\blue128;\red192\green192\blue192;}{\stylesheet{\ql \li0\ri0\widctlpar\aspalpha\aspnum\faauto\adjustright\rin0\lin0\itap0 \fs24\lang1035\langfe1035\cgrid\langnp1035\langfenp1035 \snext0 Normal;}{\*\cs10 \additive \ssemihidden +Default Paragraph Font;}{\*\ts11\tsrowd\trftsWidthB3\trpaddl108\trpaddr108\trpaddfl3\trpaddft3\trpaddfb3\trpaddfr3\trcbpat1\trcfpat1\tscellwidthfts0\tsvertalt\tsbrdrt\tsbrdrl\tsbrdrb\tsbrdrr\tsbrdrdgl\tsbrdrdgr\tsbrdrh\tsbrdrv +\ql \li0\ri0\widctlpar\aspalpha\aspnum\faauto\adjustright\rin0\lin0\itap0 \fs20\lang1024\langfe1024\cgrid\langnp1024\langfenp1024 \snext11 \ssemihidden Normal Table;}}{\*\rsidtbl \rsid13858233}{\*\generator Microsoft Word 10.0.4219;}{\info +{\author User name placeholder}{\operator User name placeholder}{\creatim\yr2004\mo12\dy14\hr20\min13}{\revtim\yr2004\mo12\dy14\hr20\min18}{\version2}{\edmins5}{\nofpages2}{\nofwords943}{\nofchars7647}{\*\company Your Company Name}{\nofcharsws8573} +{\vern16469}}\margl1134\margr1134\margt1417\margb1417 \widowctrl\ftnbj\aenddoc\hyphhotz425\noxlattoyen\expshrtn\noultrlspc\dntblnsbdb\nospaceforul\hyphcaps0\horzdoc\dghspace120\dgvspace120\dghorigin1701\dgvorigin1984\dghshow0\dgvshow3 +\jcompress\viewkind4\viewscale100\nolnhtadjtbl\rsidroot13858233 \fet0\sectd \linex0\headery708\footery708\colsx708\sectdefaultcl\sftnbj {\*\pnseclvl1\pnucrm\pnstart1\pnindent720\pnhang {\pntxta .}}{\*\pnseclvl2\pnucltr\pnstart1\pnindent720\pnhang +{\pntxta .}}{\*\pnseclvl3\pndec\pnstart1\pnindent720\pnhang {\pntxta .}}{\*\pnseclvl4\pnlcltr\pnstart1\pnindent720\pnhang {\pntxta )}}{\*\pnseclvl5\pndec\pnstart1\pnindent720\pnhang {\pntxtb (}{\pntxta )}}{\*\pnseclvl6\pnlcltr\pnstart1\pnindent720\pnhang +{\pntxtb (}{\pntxta )}}{\*\pnseclvl7\pnlcrm\pnstart1\pnindent720\pnhang {\pntxtb (}{\pntxta )}}{\*\pnseclvl8\pnlcltr\pnstart1\pnindent720\pnhang {\pntxtb (}{\pntxta )}}{\*\pnseclvl9\pnlcrm\pnstart1\pnindent720\pnhang {\pntxtb (}{\pntxta )}}\pard\plain +\ql \li0\ri0\nowidctlpar\faauto\rin0\lin0\itap0 \fs24\lang1035\langfe1035\cgrid\langnp1035\langfenp1035 {\fs28\lang2057\langfe1035\langnp2057\insrsid13858233\charrsid13858233 The Eight Eggs of Valpuri}{ +\fs20\lang2057\langfe1035\langnp2057\insrsid13858233\charrsid13858233 +\par +\par Rather difficult indeed is to converse about the beginning, since the Time itself is a product of the Creation. Only Valpuri knows for sure, and yet to this day he has not revealed all of the Great Mystery, even to other gods. +It is said that during the + First Age the Duchal Library of Omaktos contained the most detailed description of these events and the elven folk of Artami long singed the Song of Fate itself, but both took their secrets with them during their fall after the Incursion. +This story is mo +stly based on researches of Suetomit Sutsac, High Priest of Otoul'iv Ik-Omit and the current Grand Duke of the rebuild Omaktos, and much of it has been verified also by Surtep Eanar Sidnarg Sumixam Xefitnop, High Priest of the Great Frog Himself and the r +uler of the Empire of Attnam. +\par One thing is sure: In the beginning, there was Valpuri. Valpuri, the Creator and the Father of the Elder Gods. But He was, and is, actually much more than His physical form we all know. It is only one of His countless manife +stations. Sutsac theorises that it is even possible that this physical form was His own creation on the beginning of the First Day. More important, in his opinion, is His manifestation as the Void, also and better known as the Sea of Eternity. +This he says to be the true form of the Great Frog. The Sea is boundless unlike any physical element and before the Awakening contained nothing, absolutely nothing. +But, somehow, someway, It became sentient and became He. And this event gave birth to time, and the First Day began. +\par After the Awakening Valpuri looked around and saw only the nothingness of the Void. But, He wanted something other than nothing to become existent, because... Why? This is one of the biggest questionmarks on the Great Mystery. Sutsac canno +t answer this, nor does any other High Priest. All we can give are guesses; Since nothingness is quite boring, perhaps it was just for fun? But this supposes Valpuri would think like a man, lusting for enjoyment, and we can't trust that. +Perhaps He had a mind of an artist like Neno Sokokin, only creating because of the deligth of creation? Better guess, but still supposes Valpuri to think with a mind of a lesser being, which is not appropriate. +Sutsac trusts there is some greater meaning behind this, some yet not unraveled and perhaps never understandable to any lifeform lesser than the Great Frog Himself. +\par By the way, some people simply ignore this question, saying why to wonder about such, if Valpuri wouldn't have created anything, there would not be us to wonder why we weren't existent! +\par Even if the reason is yet to this day a complete mystery, the result is better known: The Elder Gods, the Okkammas and the Nenimhi, who were to shape the World. Okkammas, the Frog Gods, were the first to be born, during the Initial Day. +Each one He decided a task, layed an egg, helped it to hatch and gave the young deity a unique mind and soul, with fundamental tasks on the World. Over time, their minds have been altered, but this list shows what they were at first: +\par +\par The first Child born was Okkuu'lu T'trep, God of Life, 1/3 days after the Awakening. +\par The second was Otoul'iv Ik-Omit, God of Knowledge, 2/3 days after the Awakening. +\par The third was Okrepatri Vakk'uut, God of Change, at the end of the First Day after the Awakening. +\par +\par Next day he gave birth to the Nenimhi, the man-like gods. No one knows why he so drastically changed the nature and outlook of the gods between the first two days, perhaps because the Okkammas also achieved sentience during this day, and + wanted to have their mark on the work also. +Nonetheless while the Okkammas looked and thinked more like Valpuri, the Nenimhi were more like mankind mortals, humans, elves, dwarves and such of the nowaday world, and completed tasks of lesser value, but more specialized than the Okkammas. +As we know, this two-tree division of gods does not apply anymore, since the Chaos has altered everyone more or less (for example, a vigilant reader may find Vakk'uut's profession quite a bit different and Senner's complete +ly contrarian compared to what they are today). +\par The Nenimhi were: +\par +\par Nenitra Akirali, God of Machines, born 1 1/3 days after the Awakening. +\par Nenaria Si'kkieh, God of Money, born 1 2/3 days after the Awakening (twin of Senner). +\par Nenaria Senner, Goddess of Beauty, born 1 2/3 days after the Awakening (twin of Si'kkieh). +\par Neno Sokokin, Goddess of Music, born at the end of the Second day after the Awakening (twin of T'lepasev). +\par Neno T'lepasev, Goddess of Imagination, born at the end of the Second day after the Awakening (twin of Sokokin). +\par +\par It is said T'trep had great influence on the creation of Senner (since he already planned how the mortals would breed) and also on lesser degree to the Neno sisters since their tasks were advantageous for a happy life. +However he actually opposed the creation of Akirali and Si'kkieh for he foresaw they were not good for nature. +\par Ik-Omit influenced the making of Akirali (no need to say why), Sokokin (music is mathemacy, and mathemacy is science) and T'lepasev (source of inventions come from an imaginative mind) and taught them many things in their initial hours. +At first, Si'kkieh he didn't, for he saw not how he could help the goals of science, until this cunning young one wired up promises of future sponsoration, and gained what knowledge he needed. +Senner was the only one left without proper teaching, and became the least intelligent. Only thing she truly learnt was Sokokin's notes, for the Neno goddess needed a singer for her brilliant melodies. And how lovely + was Senner's voice those days... And how sad, that today it is forever lost. +\par Vakk'uut gave much ideas to Akirali, for machines must move and their state change in order to work, the quicker it happens the better. Si'kkieh he gave the thougth of circula +ting economy, which allowed those who wanted to collect as much they wanted, and those who didn't to spend as much as they could. T'lepasev he gave her everchanging mind which always opens paths to new portraits of imaginative events. +Particulary he enjoyed the songs of Sokokin, and made even some of that kind himself, for speed and changing are major parts of music. +\par Thus were the Eigth Elder Gods alive, the three Okkammas and the five Nenimhi, after the First Two Days of Creation. +\par +\par }{\fs28\lang2057\langfe1035\langnp2057\insrsid13858233\charrsid13858233 The Forming +\par }{\fs20\lang2057\langfe1035\langnp2057\insrsid13858233\charrsid13858233 +\par And the First Gods had been born and swimmed in the Sea of Eternity. The Great Task of Building the World was to begin. At first, T'lepasev imagined the Earth how it would be once completed. +She saw the mountains, rivers, birds of the sky, the sentient races that would dominate the lands, events that would shape the destiny of nations. +Since physical writable surfaces did not yet exist, she dictated her dream to Sokokin, whom which composed it as a song, the most eternal of all forms of information. And at the e +vening of the Third Day Senner was ready to sing the Song of Fate to the other Elders and the Great Frog Himself. And all they noded to the Neno as a sign of acceptance. And the Plan was complete. +\par In the beginning of the Fourth Day Otoul'iv wrote the Laws of Physics which would determine the ways of energy's and it's many forms' behavior. +It is said, especially on the earlier ages, that there is virtually an infinite amount of these Laws, just so that the mortal could never unravel every of them. +This world is complex indeed; many of the Laws we all know well, like the Law of Gravity or the Law of Friction, some are abstracter and needed only in very special occasions, like the Law of Relativity or the Law of Thermodynamics. +But as we speak with Suetomit about this, he shakes his head and shows his discustion towards this old-fashioned and worn-out set of theories. Today among the top-ranking scientific circles of Omaktos there is no true belief of + a law collection like this, but of one Universal Law, from which all others are derived from, and continuous effort is made for it's final discovery. Whatever the truth, it wasn't an easy job for Ik-Omit. +\par And in the evening of the Fourth Day Valpuri th +e Great Frog casted the Spell of Creation, the most suberb magical act of all of Time, and summoned the Law(s) into existence, to rule upon the World, to which he allocated a space from the Void, a flat cylinder, said to be 4242 miles wide and 256 miles i +n height, and placed it above His own Back, where it now resides. It is said the latter was done for otherwise "the Earth would sink into the Sea", whatever that would mean.}{\fs20\lang2057\langfe1035\langnp2057\insrsid13858233 +\par }{\fs20\lang2057\langfe1035\langnp2057\insrsid13858233\charrsid13858233 +\par }} \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/Doc/Lore/Fiction/God_titles.txt b/Doc/Lore/Fiction/God_titles.txt new file mode 100644 index 000000000..aa912a685 --- /dev/null +++ b/Doc/Lore/Fiction/God_titles.txt @@ -0,0 +1,91 @@ +Valpurus + the King of Gods + the God of Kings + the Master of Fate + the Lord of Light + the First among His Lessers + the Lord Upon the Throne of Creation + the Great Frog Beneath the World Who Bears the Greatest of All Burdens + +Legifer + the Radiant + the All-Seeing Sun + the Holy Flame of Hope + the Last Judge in the Heavens + +Atavus + the Charitable + the Midwinter King + the Polar Bear Rider + the Mendicant God + +Dulcis + the Lady of the Lovesick + the Muse + the Mirthbringer + +Seges + the Lady of Harvest and Fertility + the Lady of the Seasons + the Queen of Fields + the Divine Midwife + +Sophos + the Loremaster + the Ancient One + the Dreamer in the Sea + the Living Library + +Silva + the Mother Nature + the Plant Princess + the Crystal Queen + the Queen of Beasts + the Lady of Life + +Loricatus + the God-Machine + the Cogwheel King + +Mellis + of Silver Tongue and Golden Scales + the Marvellous Merchant + +Cleptia + the Mistress of Magpies + the Thief of the Moon + +Nefas + of Star-crossed Love + the Queen of Serpents + She Who Kisses with Poisonous Lips + +Scabies + the Saint of the Sick + the Depraved One + the Mother of Spiders + +Infuscor + the Sorceress Supreme + the Dark One + +Cruentus + the Child of the Blood Moon + the Bloody Saviour + the Tyrant of Tyrants + the Chosen One + +Mortifer + the Destroyer of Worlds + the Once and Future King + the Avatar of Apocalypse + the Devourer of Souls + the Impaled Lord + the Dark Sovereign + the Deathless Demon-God + the True King of Oblivion + +Solicitus + the Unbeliever + the Reluctant God + of the Lost Causes diff --git a/Doc/Lore/Fiction/Hedgehogs.txt b/Doc/Lore/Fiction/Hedgehogs.txt new file mode 100644 index 000000000..4815be4ac --- /dev/null +++ b/Doc/Lore/Fiction/Hedgehogs.txt @@ -0,0 +1,7 @@ +Long time ago, Dulcis created the hedgehogs, at first just for fun. At these times they were what they seem, cute and harmless. Soon people began to worship these critters in the temples of Dulcis and it became the sacred animal of its creator. + +Then the Great Divine War broke up and many things changed. In the later stages of the war, the followers of Scabies, the goddess of mutations and disease, altered a single hedgehog by the foulest of magic. This change was dramatic; the helpless, innocent creature was turned into a fierce menace which attacked everything it saw but for its own kin. Then the monstrous hedgehog disappeared and the followers of Dulcis rejoiced. + +Few years later, the War was over and the newly created Attnamese Empire brought order where there was none before. However, all the people slowly realised the hedgehogs were different now. The old and cute ones were gone, crowded out by the fierce spawn of the first dire hedgehod. Followers of Dulcis noticed this but were unable to prevent their sacred animal from turning into a horrible beast and many worshippers perished in their attempt to break the curse and bring back the holy hedgehogs. This all led to great hunts where brave men attacked the nesting grounds of the hedgehogs, with numerous casualties on both sides. + +At the present, hedgehogs have gotten rare and have taken residence in small caves and underground places. They are almost never met outsides any more, where they brought joy into the hearts of men once. diff --git a/Doc/Lore/Fiction/HistoryOfDarkKnighthood.txt b/Doc/Lore/Fiction/HistoryOfDarkKnighthood.txt new file mode 100644 index 000000000..d6926dd22 --- /dev/null +++ b/Doc/Lore/Fiction/HistoryOfDarkKnighthood.txt @@ -0,0 +1,9 @@ +It began with the first war of the gods. Mortifer rose against Valpurus for supremacy, and they were joined by other gods. Legifer, chosen by Valpurus, and Atavus were the first to aid Valpurus. Infuscor and Cruentus, though they weren't agreeable, joined Mortifer. Loricatus, though he would have liked to join Valpurus, was forced to stay neutral, forging weapons and armor for all. It was at the height of this war, that the artifacts came to be, for the gods soon found themselves in a stalemate, so they got underlings to battle for them. These underlings were weak, puny mortals, so they gifted them with artifacts and aid when they prayed. Valpurus elected a High Priest, and gave him the Justifier. Legifer asked for an explosive mace to be forged. Cruentus, to spite Loricatus, suggested to Mortifer that he create a deadly mace himself, because Valpurus had Justifier and Mortifer had nothing. So, calling upon Infuscor, Mortifer imbued the Neerc Se-ulb with the destructiveness that was his very nature. The Justifier was still very mighty though, so the chaotic gods sought various ways for their underlings to defeat the High Priest. Infuscor came up with thunder hammers. Cleptia got Saal'thul and whips of thievery. Scabies, chameleon whips. When Sophos asked for Vermis, Infuscor asked for Mjolak. All this kept Loricatus very busy. + +After a while, there came a brief reprieve, a lull in the course of the war, the eye of the storm. During this time, many mortals, seeking protection, became devout worshipers. Some of them were named champions, a parody of the High Priest of Valpurus. It was during this time, that the Order of Dark Knights came to be. The first Master Dark Knight was given the Neerc Se-ulb, and he wrought much destruction with it. A powerful man, pride was his undoing. Believing that none could defeat him, he sought out the High Priest and gave battle. At first, it seemed to be going his way... until his mace-arm was severed. Mortifer was enraged at the loss of Neerc Se-ulb, and when he managed to reclaim it, he vowed that no mortal should wield it unless he was become a champion of Mortifer, which was harder now than it was before, for Mortifer had lost what little trust he had in man. The second Master Dark Knight, the son of the first (for in the beginning titles were inherited) vowed that he would have vengeance against the High Priest, and led the Dark Knights to victory after victory, for few remained steadfast in the beats of the battledrum of Cruentus, and those few fell to Mjolak in the hands of the Master Dark Knight. Before long, the Justifier met Mjolak, and, the High Priest being of venerable age, fell to the mind-numbing shockwaves of Mjolak. It seemed that Mortifer had won, but wait! There was a glow, and the High Priest returned to life! He gave a mighty shout of prayer, and behold! Inlux the Archangel of Valpurus came to earth in a flash of light, and flaming sword in hand! For while Cruentus was busy with the Order of Dark Knights, the lawful gods secretly commissioned Loricatus to forge flaming swords, and Loricatus had made nine of these. The lawful archangels each received one, and Valpurus kept one for himself, a mighty blade of valpurium, +10. The Dark Knights were routed, but now the secret was out, and Infuscor, through Mellis, managed to secure the other two flaming swords, and they were given to the third Master Dark Knight, Xinroch was his name. He did what no mortal achieved before, the friendship of the mages of Infuscor and the Dark Knights of Cruentus, and in this time the Dark Knights became smarter, and the mages stronger. + +Xinroch was highly successful in his campaigns, and it was during his life that the Order of Dark Knights truly flourished. Xinroch made good use of mages, for now that they were tougher, they were no longer restricted indoors, and a few always accompanied the Dark Knights when they went to battle. Even Ischaldirh, champion of Infuscor since the beginning of the war and a true advocate of "mind over matter", saw good in this, for now they had a greater range of studies. Especially the testing of new spells and formulae on enemies encountered. This also allowed necromancy to come into its own right. However, Xinroch was still a mortal, and over time he aged, and weakened. Finally, when he was slain in battle, they put him away and set his second-in-command to guard his tomb, awaiting an appropriate moment to be reborn. One of Xinroch's flaming swords was lost, however, so the mages crafted a shield for him. That devastating battle was not the last in the war, yet it signaled the end, and soon open war ceased. + +The Order of Dark Knights weren't finished, however. When the High Priest of Valpurus founded Attnam and Attnamese conquests began a few decades later, many of those enslaved sought freedom and vengeance, and found it in the Dark Knights. Neerc Se-ulb being in the possession of Mortifer, Mjolak (along with most semi/artifacts) lost in the war, a flaming sword in Xinroch's lifeless hand and the other lost, the Dark Knights turned to a more militaristic approach, and adopted the long swords of the Cossacks as the primary weapon. Decent damage, good reach, not too hard to master and easily mass produced, it became their standard weapon and remains so to this day. Grand Master Dark Knights, however, seeking the glory of the First Masters, sheathed their long swords and picked up other weapons. + +The present Grand Master Dark Knight, Golgor Dhan, is a man of unknown age. His birthplace is unclear, but it is known that he was originally a guard of Attnam. He maintains a guard's appreciation of large swords, and is an expert with the largest swords in existence - two-handed scimitars. He has trained with those to the point of wielding them single-handedly, and delivers slashes with a zealous ferocity also carried over from his guard days. Of the First Masters, he is most like Xinroch. Although he disdains anything but straight forward one-on-one combat, he sees the usefulness of the mages. diff --git a/Doc/Lore/Fiction/HistoryOfGolems.txt b/Doc/Lore/Fiction/HistoryOfGolems.txt new file mode 100644 index 000000000..e8da2ee39 --- /dev/null +++ b/Doc/Lore/Fiction/HistoryOfGolems.txt @@ -0,0 +1,11 @@ +Humans, dwarves, kobolds, orcs, and most other life is comprised of creatures of many fleshes. A golem is a creature of a singular flesh. Despite this, most golems commonly seen are actually very physiologically similar to humans. Where a human has flesh and bones and blood, so does a golem. However, a golem's flesh is not made of flesh, nor its bone made of bone, nor its blood made of blood. An iron golem, for instance, is a creature of iron flesh, with iron bones, and molten iron coursing through its veins. They have only two major differences in anatomy from a human. Other than muscle, skin, bone, and blood, a golem has no other organs. More importantly, where a human keeps its brain, a golem keeps a holy scroll of one of the greater gods. A bone golem, for instance, has a holy scroll of Mortifer, whereas a green crystal golem has the holy scroll of Silva. This scroll is, of course, created entirely of one material: the iron golem's scroll is made entirely of iron, and its holy words written in iron ink. + +The proper creation of a golem is a long and difficult process. The golem's body, while not terribly complicated, is often very difficult to create. To create an iron golem, for instance, one must first forge the iron skeleton -- almost as difficult as forging a fully articulated suit of armor, this is the easiest step. The muscles must be created by individually stretching iron wires across the joints of the golem's body, with room left in between them at regular intervals for blood. The skin must be created in the same manner as a suit of armor. And the blood itself must be melted and poured into the golem just as the scroll itself is placed into its head - too soon and it would melt the muscles together, too late and the golem would come to life and immediately die of lack of blood. + +However, properly created golems are rare. It is unknown if any created this way still walk the earth. Ages ago, not many years after the first golems were created, the gods began providing their followers with golem head scrolls that would perform much of the work without the delicate process. It was not long until Loricatus was providing his followers with iron scrolls that would take any roughly human-shaped iron lump with a hole in its head and create a fully functional servant. Much as they copied angels from Dulcis, all the other gods quickly stole this idea. + +Infuscor created the first scrolls that would shape arbitrary lumps of material into the required form. Not to be outdone, Sophos created parchment scrolls that would convert themselves into the right material when used, provided it was a material Sophos favored. + +Some time after all the gods had copied this from each other, the elder light mage Yenralvitc The Direct created a simple scroll that would determine what material something was made of and burn portions of itself depending on what it was. He attached this scroll to a scroll from each god and set it to burn all but the appropriate scroll to a given material. He used his impressive array of magical powers to create thousands of these scrolls, which he planned to use to debase the various golem scroll monopolies to which he objected. + +Yenralvitc was smited by multiple gods at the same time for this, and his scrolls scattered to the winds. However, even today they are still found fairly frequently due to the sheer number he created. These scrolls usually being available, the gods stopped provided scrolls of their own. Despite his death, Yenralvitc's goal was still more or less accomplished. diff --git a/Doc/Lore/Fiction/HolyBanana.txt b/Doc/Lore/Fiction/HolyBanana.txt new file mode 100644 index 000000000..c3d4edeca --- /dev/null +++ b/Doc/Lore/Fiction/HolyBanana.txt @@ -0,0 +1,3 @@ +Oily Orpiv was a former champion of Mellis, the leader of a vast commercial empire. He traded in many goods, as any true follower of Mellis would, but his empire began the greater part of its rise when on a commercial expedition he discovered a small village that never developed technology because they never had to deal with the hardships of agriculture (and enraged overworked draft animals) because of a seeming miracle crop. Oily Orpiv had discovered the banana. Being a true follower of Mellis, he subjugated the people and turned them into a highly efficient banana plantation and a massive trade infrastructure to support shipping the bananas. Due to the novelty of the new food, he turned a quick profit that he soon used as capital for the rest of his business ventures. + +Because bananas were ultimately what resulted in his success, Oily Orpiv saved the third banana he ever saw (he ate the first and sold the second claiming it was the first) as a keepsake. He happened to be holding it when he became the champion of Mellis, and as a gift Mellis imbued the banana with many powers. diff --git a/Doc/Lore/Fiction/Ommel.txt b/Doc/Lore/Fiction/Ommel.txt new file mode 100644 index 000000000..1912da0af --- /dev/null +++ b/Doc/Lore/Fiction/Ommel.txt @@ -0,0 +1,15 @@ +You know how dromedaries have one hump and camels have two? + +Ommels have eight, in a circular pattern. + +They are docile herbivores that live in large herds headed by a single ancient white-haired ommel (informally referred to as "bristlers" by researchers due to the sharp spine-like quality their hair takes on as it turns white). They do not generally react to human presence unless attacked. Ommels are extremely large animals -- calves take up an entire Attnamese Standard Tile, adults take up a 2x2 AST area, and bristlers have been known to take up entire 3x3 AST areas. + +The ommel is remarkable in that their physiology seems reversed from almost all other animals. Their diet consists mostly of plants that to most other animals (including humans) are poisonous at best and as a more general rule deadly on contact. While their meat is unsurprisingly vile and poisonous, most of their waste products are high in vitamins that are extremely beneficial other animals (still including humans). + +While not exactly domesticated, communities in the far west exist that use ommels as a type of cattle. Ommels shed their coats every year in preparation for the wet season (in fact they are the only animal that does not migrate away from the Yitnur mountains during this season, using their razor-sharp hooves to maintain a purchase on the ground even when the season's peak reaches and nothing is left but water and rock), and their hair is knitted into durable armors. Ommel waste products are carefully collected by handlers and sold for their beneficial properties. + +Because the ommel normally barely notices humans, handlers must take great care to not get stepped on and thus killed by the animal's incredibly sharp hooves. While female ommels produce milk, but attempts to milk an ommel invariably results in dismemberment. This has not discouraged entrepreneurs from attempting to find a way to milk these creatures, though it is unlikely that ommel milk is very nutritious to anything other than ommels. Ommels have been successfully used as draft animals, but only when the ommel was already headed in the direction the handlers needed -- ommels do not mind being given extremely heavy loads, apparently not even noticing the extra burden, but attempts to sway the animal to move in a useful direction go equally unnoticed (or result in the ommel becoming enraged). + +Once enraged an ommel will either gnaw at its handlers with its powerful jaw muscles and hard, blunt molars, leading to an excruciatingly painful death by crushing, or kick with one of its eight sharp hooves, leading to an amazingly bloody but overall more pleasant death. + +The lifespan of an ommel is significantly more than that of a human, to the point of currently being unknown. They do eventually die of old age, and their bones, hooves, and teeth are harvested for their great strength. Ommel bristlers apparently have even greater lifespans than normal ommels, which, along with the fact that a given herd will only have one bristler at a given time and the fact that they do not shed their hair during the winter, makes materials made of their distinctive barbed hair incredibly rare. Currently there are three known suits of ommel bristler armor and six known ommel bristle weapons. The locations of most of these are lost and the only reason they are not assumed destroyed is their incredible durability. diff --git a/Doc/Lore/Fiction/SaalThul.txt b/Doc/Lore/Fiction/SaalThul.txt new file mode 100644 index 000000000..412ddaf59 --- /dev/null +++ b/Doc/Lore/Fiction/SaalThul.txt @@ -0,0 +1,57 @@ +You hear a voice, just above a whisper. You can't seem to find the source, but it can't be far away. The voice has a peculiar quality... + +The crescent moon slowly crept towards the mountaintops as I watched the town. + +It was a cold, windy autumn night on the Käydä Kauppaa Plateau. The winter snows were not far away - a week, perhaps two. I could not wait any longer. Once the snow came, the pass would become impossible to traverse safely. I would be trapped on the vast, open plateau. + +I had to act. Tonight. + +Soft, like leather... + +Before me lay the city of Markkinoida, asleep behind it's high walls and iron gates. At it's heart lay the Great Marketplace, and the Grand Vault of Mellis. Within that vault lay countless treasures: precious gemstones, golden crowns, magical rings, ancient tomes of forgotten lore... and a small painting the size of an apple. The painting was why I had come to this place. + +I would take it. + +But first, I had to reach it. + +Sharp, like a dagger... + +I knelt on the rocks and lay my swords before me. They were trophies, forged of unbroken mithril by the legendary forgemaster Seppä, meant to commemorate the peace between two great kings, and stolen by myself in my youth. I lay the Book of Cleptia before me and said a prayer to my mistress. Then I stood and vanished into the night, blades in hand. The book I left behind. Like my other possessions, it would not help me within. I travel light. + +The walls posed little challenge. They were tall, yes; but they had been built to impress traders, and fend off bands of raiders. They were not meant to keep out well-prepared individuals. I scaled them quickly, fell in behind a patrol, and slipped into the city unnoticed. + +The marketplace was deserted, save for the guards at the Vault and a few beggars. Now the challenge would begin. + +Hard, like the eyes of a killer... + +I needed a distraction to enter the vault. This was easily arranged. I found some beggars huddled around a small fire in an alley. I quietly slew them, then took a burning brand from their fire and hurled it into the marketplace. Within a few minutes a blaze had begun. + +As I watched, half of the guard detachment at the Vault were dispatched to help contain the fire. Only four were left at the front. I didn't even have to kill any of them to enter through a window, though once inside I had to kill three more - two guards I had to pass, and another patrolman who found me unexpectedly. + +I moved through the vault quickly. A few drops of acid disabled the locks on the doors as I searched through the rooms. The gold and trinkets did not interest me. I had no desire for wealth. My talents would be wasted on such petty goals. + +At last, I found it. I entered a room containing many of the greatest works of art ever created by human hands. I walked by the Last Statue of Paska Kuvanveistäjä. I passed over a hitherto-unknown piece by the Mage-Artist Mikkelange. And there, on a pedestal, was the painting I had come for. + +It was small, set in a circular frame. It depicted a pastoral scene: two women sit by a tree, while a young man stands before them, hand outstretched as he sings to the women. Perhaps this does not do it justice. It is not just a painting. In truth, it is not fair to say it is a painting at all. It is a work of art by Dulcis Herself. It lives, it breathes; you can almost hear it sing. And it does not only depict some fantasy: it is a chapter in the lives of the Gods. We mortals can only comprehend a shadow of it's glory. + +Urgent, like... + +The smell of smoke. The vault was aflame. I sheathed one sword, snatched the artwork up and made a hasty retreat. + +The results of my handiwork with the guards within the vault had been found. There were a half-dozen of them waiting for me when I emerged. They shouted something at me, but I did not hear them. There was only one thought: the path to freedom. + +The guards rushed me in the firelight. I ducked, and dodged; slashed, and stabbed. Without both swords, I am handicapped. A sharp pain lanced through my side as a spear blade penetrated my armor. Blades flashing, I break free of the group. The firelight shining off my blade makes it seem like burnished gold, but the red stains of blood are unmistakable. Four guards are still standing, preparing to surround me again. But I am past them. I hear more rushing to the Marketplace. I turn, and run into the city. + +Tired, like an old chair. + +An hour later, I knelt at the Book, my swords crossed before me. A glow lit the city. Shouts, screams, and smoke were still rising into the sky. The moon had set. My side was wet with blood. + +I prayed. + +"I have done as you asked, my lady." I lay the painting upon the book. "Take this offering. May it please you." I remained there for a few minutes. Then I stood. The book and painting remained. Cleptia was not impressed. I would have to try harder. + +But I would fulfill my vow. I would serve Celptia in the Shadowed Halls. My name - Saal'Thul - would be known and feared by all - mortal and immortal alike. + +I gathered my things and vanished into the night. + +The voice falls silent. You look at the mithril sword in your hand. Could it be...? diff --git a/Doc/Lore/Fiction/Turox.txt b/Doc/Lore/Fiction/Turox.txt new file mode 100644 index 000000000..45e211f82 --- /dev/null +++ b/Doc/Lore/Fiction/Turox.txt @@ -0,0 +1,27 @@ +So, ye want another story, do ye? Well, how would you like to hear about the Fortress of Prym, and the valiant knights of Legifer who defended it? A grand tale it is. + +You don't want to hear about Prym? You want to hear about the Ogres of Fentrylund? Bah! I won't waste my time. Now sit down, shut up, and listen, you little twerp. + +So! *Ahem* Prym was a great citadel, a nearly impregnable fortress. Set atop a steep hill, protected by high, thick walls, surrounded by a deep moat, and guarded by the valor of the Shining Knights of Legifer, it withstood many sieges. Xinroch himself, with his army at his back, was unable to take it! But alas, no castle is truly impossible to capture. So it was with Prym. + +Many years after Xinroch's failed assault, Cruentus sent his champion to destroy the stronghold of his arch nemesis' followers. So Il-Khan, one of the greatest orcs of the ages, came to Prym with an army of orcs, goblins, kobolds, and gibberlings at his beck and call. They surrounded the castle and lay waste to the countryside. Near daily, they assaulted the walls, and for months the valiant warriors within beat them back at great cost. Dozens of defenders fell daily, mortally wounded by the weapons of their enemies; but for every knight struck dead, scores of the enemy were sent to the Bloody Halls of Cruentus. Shut up Timmy, you can piss when I'm finished. Hand me my vodka, will you? + +*Ahhh* That's more like it. Now where was I? Ah yes, the siege of Prym. The Grandmaster of the Shining Knights, Lord Marshal Priap, knew that the situation was desperate. The supplies within the fortress - as well as the men - would be exhausted long before the enemy's. So he wrote a letter, and dispatched it via flying ostrich to Attnam, requesting aid. High Priest Patty, however, could not come to his aid, for he was engaged in a mortal struggle of his own against his prodigious gut... or something along those lines. Maybe it was the elves... Anyway. When Priap heard the news, he knew he and his men were doomed. + +The next night, after beating back yet another assault, he gathered his tired, wounded, demoralized men in the High Temple of Legifer and bid them pray for salvation. By this time, only 50 of the knights yet lived, and ten of those suffered from dire wounds. Yet they knelt by their lord and prayed to Legifer. + +And behold! Legifer heard their call! But Legifer was also busy, and asked them to call back. + +So the men went to the Lesser Temple of Seges, and prayed again. Seges rushed to their aid, and cooked them all a magnificent meal of boiled bananas, canned beef, and baked cat. Then Seges wished them luck against the ravening hoards at their doorstep. + +Sophos taught them everything there was to know about orcish dining etiquette. Atavus gave them all hand-knitted sweaters, Dulcis played some nice music for them, and Silva made it stop raining. + +The knights were getting desperate now. So, they all crowded into the (long-dead) blacksmith's forge and clustered around his dis-used shrine to Loricatus, and they prayed. Seeing their plight, Loricatus took pity on the beleaguered soldiers and devised a way to aid them. He worked all night and through the next day; but when he was finished, each and every soldier carried a new, divinely crafted mace of arcanite and meteoric steel. + +Right about this time is when Legifer got back from his date with Nefas, and realized what had happened in his absence. Not to be outdone by some neutral forge god, Legifer sent Iustitia to bless the weapons forged by Loricatus with the might of the Divine Fires. + +Thusly armed, Priap ordered his men to assemble in the courtyard. It was a misty morning. Priap gave a rousing speech, probably about courage and heroism and the final stand of the Light or some such nonsense, and led his warriors through the gates into the teeth of the waiting enemy. With every blow from the valiant Shining Knights, holy retribution spewed forth from the maces, obliterating kobolds and goblins. But Legifer's blessing proved to be a two-edged sword: the Knights themselves found they were as vulnerable to the divine blasts as were the enemy. + +In the end, the Shining Knights were defeated; their holy weapons stolen; their fortress plundered. But they had inflicted a heavy toll on the forces of Il-Khan; he was forced to retreat to the mountains lest he be caught and destroyed by the armies of Attnam who were now riding in search of vengeance. They say you can still find the weapons scattered through caves and dungeons the world over... + +What? Did the maces have names? Of course they had names! They were all named Turox! Dumb boy. Why? You ask too many questions. Go bother your mother. diff --git a/Doc/Lore/Fiction/Vermis.txt b/Doc/Lore/Fiction/Vermis.txt new file mode 100644 index 000000000..d4bd3c748 --- /dev/null +++ b/Doc/Lore/Fiction/Vermis.txt @@ -0,0 +1,29 @@ +High in the mountains, just beyond the borders of the Attnamese empire, lies a great temple to Sophos. The Sophite monks who live here are part scholar, part knight-errant: their holy duty is to seek and preserve knowledge and wisdom. Below the temple are it's crypts, where beside the remains of the greatest of their number are stored the Sophites most valued treasures: neigh-endless shelves bearing books, tomes, scrolls and maps beyond counting. Some say that lost somewhere deep in this library lies a tome containing the secret of immortality - a prize truly worthy of Cleptia! + +But simply entering the crypts is neigh impossible, for all but the most dedicated Sophites are barred from entry by a dozen guards, six massive puzzle doors, and an old man known only as the Riddler. So lets forget about the crypts for now. + +Instead lets talk about Karl, one of the greatest Sophites to ever live. Karl was just a boy when found, apparently abandoned by his parents when he was only 19 years old. The old Sophite scholar-knight who found him recognized Karl's gifts when he was seen cooking the Holy Meal of Sophos, a difficult to master, secret recipe passed down by word of mouth from one Chief Temple Food Preparer to his successor for hundreds of years: fried banana, boiled ostrich meat, and salt. Yet Karl had cooked the meal with no such instruction! Clearly here was one favored by Sophos! + +After some persuasion and a sharp blow to the head, Karl returned with the old priest to the Temple of Sophos, where he underwent training to become a monk. He rose through the ranks rather quickly, and before he was 50 he was the fifth-highest-ranked member of the Martial Order of Wisdom, the military arm of the Temple. His exploits in the intervening years could fill a dozen thick books - the Quest for the Lost Scroll of Gnih Ton, the Voyage Across the Mighty River Pieni, the Journey to the Super Market, the Confrontation with the Cashier, and many more - but we'll only concern ourselves with his last mission: to find the secret of creating Iced Cream and bring it back to the Temple. + +This was a dangerous mission, far beyond the lands he was used to. He would have to travel to a dry land, where there was no snow, and it only rained 130 days out of the year. Fortunately, Karl was a grown man by now, with a body grown strong from defending his faith and carrying groceries. He also a master of the art of Keihäs-Käyttö, the ancient Sophite spear-fighting (or at least, spear-fishing) tradition, and an expert survivalist. And, to aid him on his mission, the High Priest of Sophos gave him a new suit of hardened leather armor, and a finely crafted oaken spear with a blade of diamond which the temple craftsmen had been unable to sell to a visiting nobleman. Thusly equipped, Karl set off on the greatest adventure of his life. + +He first traveled to the small villiage of ... what's that? What? You're BORED?! Already? Alright, alright, fine! I'll cut to the end. Damn kids... + +Karl eventually found the land of the Iced Cream Men and learned their secrets. But on the way back to the temple, he became lost in the strange lands. As his supplies began to dwindle, he realized he had to contact Sophos and give him the knowledge of Iced Cream before he died. So he built an altar to Sophos, and consecrated it with the blood of a Troll, that vile, knowledge-hating race so common in the south-lands. The sacrifice complete, he knelt at the altar and prayed. + +He heard the soft, deep, rumbling voice of his god. + +"What knowledge dost thou bringest me, mortal?" + +"O Wise One! O Holy Mind! I bring to you the methods of making Iced Cream, that you may preserve these secrets for eternity!" + +"Thou art the first to travel to the south-lands, and return with knowledge of Iced Cream. Teacheth me, Mortal, and be named my Champion!" + +So Karl taught Sophos how to make a tasty, frozen treat. As a reward, Sophos enchanted Karl's diamond-bladed spear with powers over space and time, and named it Vermis. Karl knew he was saved - with this spear, and his highly-trained mind, he simply teleport back to the temple, where food was abundant! + +But it was not to be. Infuscor, jealous of the knowledge of Iced Cream, turned Karl into a kobold when he picked up Vermis. Karl promptly teleported himself deep underground in an attempt to escape the sunlight, where he probably stepped on a land mine left over from the Dwarven Wars and was killed. The spear Vermis was never seen again. + +There. You happy now? You made me skip over all the good bits. Now go to sleep, it's past your bed time. I don't care if the sun's still up, it's bed time is when I say it's bed time! Scram! + +Where did I leave that whiskey... diff --git a/Doc/Lore/HolyStack/Excisio.mp3 b/Doc/Lore/HolyStack/Excisio.mp3 new file mode 100644 index 000000000..7a370ba81 Binary files /dev/null and b/Doc/Lore/HolyStack/Excisio.mp3 differ diff --git a/Doc/Lore/HolyStack/Incede_frater!.mp3 b/Doc/Lore/HolyStack/Incede_frater!.mp3 new file mode 100644 index 000000000..c33bce302 Binary files /dev/null and b/Doc/Lore/HolyStack/Incede_frater!.mp3 differ diff --git a/Doc/Lore/HolyStack/Mola_Mola.rtf b/Doc/Lore/HolyStack/Mola_Mola.rtf new file mode 100644 index 000000000..903e39578 --- /dev/null +++ b/Doc/Lore/HolyStack/Mola_Mola.rtf @@ -0,0 +1,152 @@ +{\rtf1\ansi\ansicpg1252\deff0\deflang1035\deflangfe1035{\fonttbl{\f0\froman\fprq2\fcharset0 Times New Roman;}} +{\*\generator Msftedit 5.41.15.1507;}\viewkind4\uc1\pard\nowidctlpar\lang2057\kerning28\f0\fs20 I fixed some typos but the Holy Text is otherwise left unchanged. I\rquote ve also added a glossary for words rarely used elsewhere.\par +\par +- Holybanana, Mensis Hex 6\super th\nosupersub 9 A.F. or August 29\super th\nosupersub 2006\par +\b\par +Glossary of terms\b0\par +\par +See Titues.txt to maybe understand who is who in this text.\par +\par +\i FEP\i0 \endash Fatal Error Productions, the name of IvanDev in the first years after the Cosmic Compilation.\par +\i The Avatar of Valpuri, the Great Frog\rquote s Manifestation\i0 \endash An artefact of wondrous power. Carried by Saint Petrus.\par +\i FEBOS\i0 \endash Fatal Error Binary Operating System, a small operating system coded by Saint Timoteus with Assembler in the second year after the Compilation. Too difficult to be used by anyone.\par +\i Jari Ojala\i0 \endash A malicious Jedi Knight who pestered us every now and then.\par +\i Renne\i0 \endash Hex\rquote s little brother, who has blood of enner beasts flowing through his veins.\par +\i to navastate\i0 \endash For example, it is navastating to ponder what navastating means.\par +\i Kenny\i0 \endash One of Hex\rquote s loudspeakers.\par +\i Castus Cellae\i0 \endash The holy cellar of Hex\rquote s family where FEP and the Valpuristic Church were founded and IVAN started. Located in M\'e4ntt\'e4, Finland.\par +\i Elpuri\i0 \endash Antivalpuri, the source of all evil in this universe. He has many forms, the most powerful being Bill Gates on his dark throne in the land of Redmond where the shadows lie.\par +\lang1035\i Valpuri-unit\i0 \endash About 0.909442635416145784777132197011692 cm.\par +\lang2057\i Valpurathlon \i0\endash The divine computer which runs the Cosmic Code. People, frogs and penguins are but objects in Its memory.\par +\i Timppa 244\i0 \endash A valkyrie who ascended to demigoddess-hood and got roughly 9.300.000 points in Nethack.\par +\b\fs28\par +Mola Mola\par +\b0\fs20\par +\b Tuesday, Mensis Valpurus 10\super th\nosupersub 2 A.F., the day of los Forty-seventh Meeting\par +In pagan calendar May 2\super nd\nosupersub 2000.\par +\b0\par +\b Episode one: Los thievery\b0\par +\par + Valpuri smiles to us more each day... The sun shines brightly today, melting the last memory of the past winter. The birds sing happily in the treetops and squirrels dance with utmost joy around the pine trunks. I arrive to Sairanens' garden, swinging my laptop case up and down happily and humming Valpuri-hymns with great pleasure. Some frogs, Hex's friends, jump to greet me, and signal me that Pontifex Maximus and the Avatar have already arrived. Once inside, I verify they told the truth; the Savior and the Great Frog's Manifestation Themselves are present, currently using Nuntius Divinitas's older machine. I set up my mobile programming base next to them, present briefly my newest achievements in FEBOS to Hex and Perttu, and then start notepad in order to begin the great task of this evening; Pius Ianitor asked me earlier today to supply him with a simple Assembler graphics library; I have named my work FEAGL and am going to make it the fastest of its kind (perhaps even with MMX support!).\par + As I sit down I notice that the atmosphere of this room seems to be darker than it should. And I understand well why. Jari showed up here yesterday. Right in the middle of our celebration of the Great Frog's holiest day, Castus Dies Valpurus itself. Yes, we had laid an acceptable amount of anti-Ojala traps around the house, but he was able to avoid all of them. It took quite a while until he left, and when he did, he made it smiling with utmost evil look at us.\par + What was his purpose? Did it consist of only ruining our day? If Bill sent him, his visit must only have been a part of some greater plan devised against us... And I fear we shall soon find out about this conspiracy.\par + Suddenly there is a knock on the door. Mystagogus shouts:\par + "In, fellow!"\par + The knocker enters indeed, by hitting the door on the ground. Everything happens very fast. A dark figure swiftly steps to the middle of the room, and before we are able to react, screams horribly. My eardrums crack and blood spills down my cheeks. I fall from the chair miserably crying my agony, and see Hex do the same. I also manage to see the enemy and the ugly, evil mask he wears. I also notice the Highest Priest; he's in a much better condition than us, actually he seems to have been completely immune to the attack. The monstrous figure sees this too, and grabs a dagger from the middle table and is about to stab our Religious Leader with it.\par + In these moments I truly am happy Pugnator Lucis is on my side. After all of this rapidly happened horror, he still stays calm and knows immediately what to do. With a voice full of pity and disgust he states:\par + "Renne's life is pure navastating."\par + The attacker stops as like some magical force had hit him. His true identity has been revealed. Nuntius Divinitas steps up, obviously possessed by an extreme anger, quickly picks Kenny and rises it. An insane bloodthirsty glance shines from his eyes and I already think we are about to witness a murder between brothers (which wouldn't of course be too bad in this occasion). But Renne is not stunned for too long, accepts the reality that he cannot hurt Perttu this time, and moves straight to the plan's part B. In a blink of an eye he grabs the Avatar from the table and before we can counteract, jumps out of the door.\par + Hex runs after him, but after a moment returns, shaking his head as a sign of failure. Renne has succeeded in stealing the Avatar.\par +\par +\b Episode two: Los Ballmertaur's wrath\b0\par +\par + Finally the shock recedes and I can again produce a voice from my lips.\par + "Did... you see... aargh... where he went?", I ask with pain pulsating through my body, "We must... oh the pain... follow him and retrieve the Holy One!"\par + "Let us make preparations first, for I sense Renne is only a puppet in this matter and someone greater servant of the Darkness opposes the Avatar this time", says the Highest Priest. He casts Cure2 on us both hurt ones, and suddenly the pool of blood around me is gone and I feel like Renne had never even screamed. He continues:\par + "So, frater Hex, I have never had need of debugging the area of Castus Cellae. I suppose thou know better where Renne could have escaped."\par + "Oh the mighty Highest Priest, I saw he went down, into the dungeons beneath our Headquarters! But I have never managed to explore them throughout, for vile beasts of Elpuri's unholy breed lurk in the deep abyss of the lower levels (in fact my theory is that Renne also originally came from there)."\par + "Well then, even though we know not what to expect, we have no choice. Take with thee whatever weapons you can find, flashlights for each of us, and some Coke for me. We'll be leaving within three internet-units of time."\par + After the units have passed we all stand at the upper edge of the stairs that Renne went down. I have a screwdriver as my weapon, Heikki has Kenny and Perttu has two one-and-a-half litre bottles of pure, authentic Coke.\par + "Brother, thou be our guide til the Unknown comes even to thy path.", Ductor Imperiosus states to Hex.\par + So, we journey downwards, slowly, because the steps are extremely narrow and slippery, and the darkness around us deepens with every step, making wayfaring even more difficult. Many times we are about to fall, but our belief in Valpuri relieves us always from this terrible possibility that would in the worst case end into losing our Cokes. At the end of the stairs we find a closed door.\par + "We must go through this door. It is always jammed, though, so I'll go first and kick it down.", says Mystagogus.\par + "No, wait brother. Thee Nethack-players are far too inexperienced for reality. We Adom-beaters know always neither to kick doors horizontally nor vertically, but from a sideward angle.", Petrus Perlucidus states.\par + So, Heikki smashes the door down sideways, and same time we notice twelve Windoze-CD:s fall down from somewhere above, breaking the floor right in front of the opened door like a knife cutting a soundcard. That was close! Again I'm very very glad that Coryphaeus Religiosus is with us.\par + On other side of the door we find ourselves in a dark labyrinth of dark grey stone walls.\par + "Do not be afraid, fellows, I know the way around", says Nuntius Divinitas.\par + He leads us through the caverns for about a quarter of an hour, and we are stunned by his determination, until the point we end up into the front of the same door from where we arrived.\par + "Er... I'm positively sure that path led to right place last time I was here! It... It must have changed by some evil force! Yeah, that's it. Don't look me like that.", says Hex.\par + We have no time to criticize him, for suddenly another voice covers his sound.\par + "MUWAHAHAHAA, that was funny! Ye stupid valpurians! Walk in circles in the cavern of certain doom! Ye are too pitiful even to laugh at!"\par + We turn and see the source of the groaning. Almost 250 Valpuri-units tall stands an evil looking monster, which I remember well from the dream of my salvation's day. A body of a gorilla and a head of Ballmer, with Windoze-logos tattooed all over skin, wielding an Xbox. I had wished I'd never have to see him again. Oh elp...ri.\par + "MUWAHAHAHAA how I see ye fear! Even Perttu the Pervert fears, doesn't he! Where is yer Avatar now, doesn't it protect ye? Don't worry, I kill ye quick! Face the wrath of Ballmertaur!"\par + With immense speed he jumps towards us. Perttu mumbles some arcane words and a burst of fire immediately hits the monster, but for no avail, it's skin crackles only for a second, and then it just laughs. After that Ballmertaur swings the Xbox at Perttu and a terrible conflict of opposite elemental powers breaks out. A blast of violent energy pushes Perttu downwards the cavern and the monster to another direction, smashing it right to the wall next to us. I and Mystagogus can finally react. As the monster stands up, Nuntius Divinitas hits him with Kenny using all his muscle power to the strike. As a result Kenny breaks into shards.\par + "Oh my Valpuri, it killed Kenny!", Hex screams as the monster picks him up as some long stick and throws him where the Highest Priest stood ten seconds ago and where his Cokes still lay. Ballmertaur laughs again, and is about to jump after him and make the finishing blow, but makes a mistake; it does not take me into account. In the critical seconds I manage to jump into his back and from there stick my screwdriver into it's eye, bursting it into ugly goo. The now one-eyed behemoth screams horribly, catches me and is about to break my neck. But a sudden voice from the end of the tunnel where Perttu flied saves me.\par + "Hex! The Coke!"\par + "I'm not giving you Coke during a battle with a Ballmer-headed gorilla, Perttu!", Hex shouts back while trying to get up.\par + "No! Use it as a weapon, thou moron!"\par + At last Nuntius Divinitas understands the point, grabs a bottle and throws it with force towards the monster right before it is able strangle me to death. The potion breaks and the holy liquid pours into it's skin which cracks up and the flesh under it dissolves. Ballmertaur drops me, screams out it's last agonies, and falls dead to the ground.\par +\par +\b Episode three: Seeing Bill's plan with clear eyeglasses\b0\par +\par + "Thee fared well, brothers Hex and Timoteus. I am proud of thee.", says Perttu, who returns walking from the abyss.\par + "How could it do such a damage even to you? I did not imagine even Bill could bounce you like that!", I ask puzzled.\par + "Dominus Paeanos, think what thou say before asking. Ballmertaur did not damage me, just my earthly form. Thou are correct that usually it could not have done even that, but now my powers here on Tellus have been weakened for one and only one reason: because the Avatar is in Renne's greasy hands."\par + "The Avatar is the only channel between my human alter ego and my true form in Terra Linuxia; for the only breakpoint concerning planet Earth's code is located in a function which is run when It's eye is spun anti-clockwise. Without It's presence, this mortal body thee see is nothing more than of a normal Magitech-knight. And it can be destroyed by Bill's forces rather easily. That's why we had to hurry here; I understand Elpuri's plan well. First Renne is manipulated to steal the Avatar from us by force of a scream and a knife, then if we stay upstairs, Jari summons thousand folds of Bill's SWAT commandos to besiege Sairanens' house and nuke us all into oblivion, and if we follow the thief, Ballmertaur awaits us. A perfect plan. If they just hadn't underestimated the power of the Valpuristic Church working together!"\par + "We must venture down and retrieve the Image of Our GOD immediately; should they manage to destroy It before We can reunion, I cannot direct my efforts to save Tellus anymore. A possible new Avatar would serve no purpose; coding such an artefact takes a long while even for me, and in the meantime Bill can easily destroy every single Guru, including thee, on Earth."\par + I shiver and already see the image of nuclear fire bursting throughout Korholanm\'e4ki, and the horrible portrait of Bill's tank forces burning Linus's, Stroustrup's and Meier's houses to the ground, melting down every last bit of hope of human race becoming Guru and seeing Terra Linuxia with us.\par + "So, without further lessons, let's go forth my children! Let us save thy homeland! The fate of a billion peelos is in our hands! Blaah blaah blaah."\par + "Oukey dokey, this time I'll lead you all to the correct door!", Mystagogus promises.\par + Indeed within five minutes we find ourselves in front of the gate that looks to have been the right way down. Now it's nothing but a pile of endless stone rubble and debris fallen from the roof.\par + "They've cut down the pillars holding the gateway. Oh elp...ri, nothing seems to succeed today!", Nuntius Divinitas curses.\par + "Fall not into despair, fellow saint. If we can't go the winding way, let's go the straight.", Vaticinator Primarius states and continues, "I sense the Avatar suffering beneath. There we shall go, directly downwards, through the Gaia's skin. Timoteus, my mana has run out since I had to use so much curative spells after that last incident. Thou must use the arts of Brown Magic I have taught thee!"\par + I understand what he asks and try to remember how the Dig spell went. (It isn't the most common one in normal life... The only thing I remember using it to is opening computer boxes as quickly as is ever possible)\par + I raise my hands, swing them wildly around, shouting:\par + "Unga unga, xvelva dunga!"\par + Within seconds our torches' light dims and disappears and it is completely dark.\par + "Ohps, that was the Darkness spell. Sorry."\par + Well, the good point is I can't see the perhaps slightly angered feelings in my friends' faces... I decide to try again.\par + "Unga unga bunga, rep movsda nunga!"\par + This time the words were correct. My brain skills are able to gather immense amounts of Valpurathlon's powers and enslave them to my purposes, and I channel them to the task of curving the forty-two dimensional time-space-vacuum between the block of stone below us and a random other target, and use repeatedly move doubleword assembler opcode between these areas. The block disappears within a blink of an eye (afterwards we got to know that it was transferred to Virtaperkos' backyard and they fed it to their numerous carnivorous bunny friends).\par + And we fall into the void.\par +\par +\b Episode four: Confronting Mola Mola\b0\par +\par + We land onto a slimy floor in an open, dark cavern. Now that I'm already in a good connection with the Universal Mana Bus (UMB), I can cast Light without too much preparing. But I should not, because the only effect of these electromagnetic rays is forcing us to vomit. The room where we landed is full of fish. Slimy, rotten fish. Perches, pike perches, roaches, every sort. The ground is filled with green slime consisting of dissolved fish eyes, gills and fins. I think I wouldn't touch that even with Valpuri-unit thick gloves on my hands and an Amulet of Life Saving on my neck (reminds me so clearly about that green slime death of Timppa 244 in Nethack)!\par + "Oh no. I always feared this.", says Hex with a sound of deep depression.\par + "What do thou say, Castus Hex?", PMGR asks.\par + "It's Mola Mola. She's here. And Renne feeds her."\par + "Mola Mola?"\par + "I'll explain. During a summer holiday a couple of years ago, that is in time of the Evolution's Execution after the Compilation, Renne was fishing in the nowadays area of Timoteus's dukedom, on lake Nuas. He caught his greatest ever perch, killed it, or that it seemed, and brought it to the shore. However, before we were able to clean and smoke it, the fish disappeared strangely. We didn't pay too much attention to that event by then, even if we should have. For the fish followed us. Somehow, it could move on land, and it was intelligent, far more intelligent than Renne for example, and it hid in our car, and infiltrated our home. And as Renne used to keep his fishes in our cellar, it went there and stayed, living by eating them. Of course, we noticed the fish disappearing, but were mostly glad for it. But as the winter came, one day the fish run out. The intelligent perch became hungry, and started hunting diskettes and finally mice from my room. I naturally searched the house up and down, interrogated and tortured Renne and all that, but at last ended in setting a trap for the thief. It was caught, and I whacked it down with a monitor, which was actually a difficult task since it had grown three times taller than normal even by then. I examined it's seemingly dead body and understood it was Mola Mola's. In the end I threw it to a wastebasket. I should have thought more, it was not any more dead than it was on Renne's boat on that cursed day when he found it."\par + I interfere:\par + "Mola Mola! A beast of legendary Nuas's breed! Carnivorous, sentient one that uses almost all of her energy in rapidly making new muscles and fins, may grow twenty feet tall, and can shut down her life supporting systems for days and still recover in full strength! Here in M\'e4ntt\'e4?"\par + "Yes. I'm afraid so."\par + "So, that is their plan. They are about to feed the Avatar to this Mola Mola. I'm sure if she likes fish, frogs go down her slimy neck also. We must hurry, she may be already eating It, and also, we have drunk our very last bottle of Coke and have no chance of replenishing our supplies.", HPoV says.\par + We search the room and find a door under one fish pile. It leads into a dirty tunnel, from which a tiny green light shines. We follow it, and light becomes stronger and uglier. Finally we find the source. In a huge cavern, a monstrous gigantic hybrid of a perch and an octopus eats fish after fish, and the light comes from her hungry eyes. She does not notice us arriving, and neither does her waiter; Renne, who serves her fresh roaches with some kind of a snow shower from a great pile in the corner. And at the top of this pile stands the Avatar shining with a yellow light of suffering, but of hope too.\par + Suddenly Mola Mola groans:\par + "ENOUGH, BUDDY. THANKS, BUT I CANNOT EAT ANYMORE THIS TIME. LET'S HAVE ANOTHER MEAL AFTER A COUPLE OF HOURS, OK?"\par + "But Molly, you should at least eat that frog on the top! They said you would like it very very much!"\par + "YEAH, YEAH, BUT NOT NOW. ON THE NEXT MEAL. I WANT TO SLEEP NOW."\par + "Well, bye then, Molly!"\par + Renne leaves.\par + "Now, Timo, when Renne's out of the beast's sight, use your mindcrafting powers to burst his head into pieces!", Hex whispers.\par + But I do not. For I feel pity. There, in the middle of a million roaches, stands Mola Mola as Renne's only friend, and Renne is walking away, also as her only friend. Here in the depths of this depressing eternal darkness. And he only stole the Avatar because Bill's servants lied to him that his friend would love it, and thought only he was taking a mere toy from Perttu... And that dagger incident, what else could one expect from a person grown up eating bloody fish with a pet monster perch and above ground using his time in Martti's Starcraft's influence?\par + "No, his life is pitiful enough now.", I answer.\par + "What? Well, relieve him, then he won't be so pitiful!"\par + Perttu interrupts us:\par + "We don't have time for this. We must reach the Avatar."\par + "Hmm... Well, we could use Nuntius Divinitas to disturb Mola Mola and sneak by that time to the Manifestation?", I propose.\par + "Thanks a lot. But the beast sleeps, so we need no 'disturber'.", says Hex.\par + "Right. You can both go and sneak to the Avatar. I of course stay here and wait for your success.", orders Perttu.\par + We don't argue, and begin our silent walk. Mola Mola seems to sleep deeply. We manage to reach the top of the fish pile.\par + "Good. Now, I'll go and give the Manifestation to Perttu and take the credit. You guard 'Molly' for this time, so she won't wake up, OK?", says Hex.\par + Before I can make some sarcastic denying answer, the proposal becomes obsolete, for we notice Mola Mola looking at us with her horribly big eyes wide open.\par + "WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY PILE OF FISH???"\par + "Well, my lady...er, fish, we...are Renne's substitutes, and he send us to pick this...frog of yours, he remembered that it's last date of use has passed, so we'll have to go and replace it.", Hex says.\par + "Yes, we'll return within a minute, good bye.", I comment, and we turn to leave.\par + "LIARS. I RECOGNIZE YOU, HEIKKI SAIRANEN, YOU WERE THE ONE THAT TRIED TO KILL ME FOR JUST BORROWING SOME MICE, WITHOUT WHICH I WOULD HAVE ALSO DIED. I SHALL HAVE MY REVENGE; I WILL EAT THE FROG AND YOU BOTH NOW."\par + She begins moving slowly towards us and we back to the wall. Looking at her five feet wide mouth we are almost assured of death by know. But Valpuri is here to help. I happen to slide my hand to my pocket, and find two FEBOS-diskets I showed to my friends in the Meeting's beginning, and hand the other one to Mystagogus.\par + "Come no nearer, you evil perch, or taste the might of binaries!"\par + "THAT I WOULD LIKE TO SEE, YOU TINY, PITIFUL MAMMALS."\par + And we aim, and throw. This is after all one of FEP's only widely accepted sports, and we both now it good enough to not miss our targets. The floppies sink deep into the monster's green eyes.\par + "Here! Run!", shouts the Highest Priest. We run wildly to the hole Renne went and Mola Mola is too confused and blinded to follow us. Perttu awaits us at the end of the tunnel, and we hand the Avatar to him.\par + "Good job! Thee are indeed pious ones! Now, I'll debug us up onto the sunlight, let's not care of this beast anymore, her time will come in my debug list, I promise!"\par + He spins the Great Frog's Manifestation's holy eye anti-clockwise and we can sense time to stop for a quarter of a second when he changes our class-instances' position vector fields on the fly. We find ourselves firmly standing on Sairanens' front yard.\par +\par +\b Epilogue\par +\b0\par + There is a knock on the door that Mystagogus just finished fixing. We don't take any risks, and set ourselves on the gate's both sides, Hex holding Stan (or is it that Jewish? I never get to know them...) and I having even a bigger screwdriver. Nuntius Divinitas says grinning:\par + "In, fellow!"\par + The door opens and we are ready to smash any evil beast that could be entering this time. But we have no need, for only one coming is a very guru figure with a shiny saint nimbus hovering over his head.\par + "Ikki! You came finally to the Meeting. Valpuri dum sumus!", we shout happily.\par + "Behold brothers, los Guru has arrived to solve all your syntax warnings! But why in dev/null are you threatening me with a speaker and a screwdriver?", Magister Ludi Machinationis states.\par + "That is a long story. I'll make a quick referent for you.", I say.\par + After the tale:\par + "That r0xx! Glad you made up back well. And btw. you should write that tale on a text file too, Procer Permagnus, of course after you finish FEAGL. But did you _really_ say you used all of that Coke?", Pius Ianitor comments.\par + We celebrate to the very night for this victory, but finally it is time to leave. I and the Highest Priest leave through the front door, and before our paths separate, I make my final statement:\par + "Oh PMGR, it wasn't really true that Chaos was so close to defeat our Church on Earth today, was it? You were just testing us, admit it!"\par + "Truly wise are thou, saint Timoteus. Thou brought honour to ICHFV during our adventure, and thou bring it now too with your cleverness. Does anyone think I would allow Gurus of Tellus to die for only a single mistake; losing _one_ unique artefact? No, I had a backup breakpoint, which I could have used at any time should things had gone too rough. It's in a function that is run when my mortal body's left testicle is spun clockwise. But I wished to see thy and thy cousin's courage should you have truly needed to fight for the Guruism's future.", he explains.\par + "Brilliant you are, oh Petrus Perlucidus Potissimus Magnus Cordatus Persapiens Sophos Praepotens! You'll never take any chances! Now, farewell, I'll go home to program some more before getting to bed. Valpuri dum sumus!", I goodbye him.\par + "Serio, frater", he answers.\par +} + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/Doc/Lore/HolyStack/README.txt b/Doc/Lore/HolyStack/README.txt new file mode 100644 index 000000000..1216eb070 --- /dev/null +++ b/Doc/Lore/HolyStack/README.txt @@ -0,0 +1,31 @@ +The Holy Stack of Valpuri, +He who carrieth our flat universe, so that it won't sink into the Sea of Eternity. + +Edition according to the Holybanana-Hexist sect. + +Much of the canonical Stack is in Finnish (eg. the writings of the prophet and clairvoyant Vesa, the Gospel of Timoteus and the Third Book of Timo), so this is but a torso and inadequate to convey the True Image of the Full Glory of Valpuri. We apologize for the inconvenience. + + +Hymns +===== +Some English and Latin hymns that glorify the Great Frog (see the folder). May Valpuri forgive us that we suck in Latin. + +Valpuri_is_alive!.mp3 - Listening to this can't leave any Valpurist sad. +Incede_frater!.mp3 - Fourth of the Five Great Hymns of Valpuri. A battle hymn. +Excisio.mp3 - The Final, Sad Hymn about the End of Runtime. + + +Images +====== +Valpuri.jpg - Valpuri swimming in the Sea of Eternity. The universe is left on a coat-rack. +Valpuri3.jpg - Artist's view of Valpuri. +Valpuri2.jpg - The Avatar of Valpuri tells us about the evil of Bill Gates. +Valpuri_ON_MAHTAVA.JPG - Valpuri coding the world. + + +Prose +===== +Titues.txt - The Latin titles of various members of the Church. It is quite difficult to understand who is who in the texts without this. +ValpuriFAQ.txt - Frequently Asked Questions about Valpurism answered by high priest Petrus. +Mola_Mola.rtf - Our legendary battle against Mola Mola. Story told by Pius Timoteus. +The_Great_Battle.rtf - An Epic Battle between the high priest Petrus and his Archenemy. Story told by Pius Petrus himself. Note that the date 10.3.3 A.F. is 30th October 2000. diff --git a/Doc/Lore/HolyStack/The_Great_Battle.rtf b/Doc/Lore/HolyStack/The_Great_Battle.rtf new file mode 100644 index 000000000..171993375 --- /dev/null +++ b/Doc/Lore/HolyStack/The_Great_Battle.rtf @@ -0,0 +1,237 @@ +{\rtf1\ansi\ansicpg1252\deff0\uc1{\fonttbl{\f0\fcharset0 Times New Roman;}{\f1\fcharset0 +Tengwar Quenya-2;}{\f2\fcharset128 Tengwar Quenya-2;}{\f3\fcharset0 Arial;}{\f4\fcharset0 +Tengwar Quenya;}{\f5\fcharset128 Tengwar Quenya;}}{\colortbl ;\red0\green0\blue0 +;}{\stylesheet{\s0\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1\f0\fs20\kerning28 Normal +;}}\paperw12240\paperh15840\margt1440\margl1800\margr1800\margb1440\headery720\footery720 +\deftab720\pgnstart1\viewkind1\viewscale100\fet0{\*\docvar{ColorSet}{-1}}{\*\docvar +{ColorPos}{-1}}{\*\docvar{StyleSet}{-1}}{\*\docvar{StylePos}{-1}}\pard\plain\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\f0\cf1\lang1033\fs144\kerning28 +{\header\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1\tqc\tx4320\tqr\tx8640\fs20\par +}{\footer\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1\tqc\tx4320\tqr\tx8640\fs20\par +}A{\cf0\fs28 nd so it came to pass, that in the third year after creation, I was + suddenly forced to a great battle, that almost destroyed all life on the World. +This is what happened in that cursed day 10.3 A.F, and what I, the first Pontifex + Maximus Grandis Ranae, Imperator M\u228\'e4ntt\u228\'e4, Pugnator Lucis, Ductor + Imperiosus, Defensor GNU, Vaticinator Primarius, Soter Humanitatis, Phylarchus +Interplanus Communitatis Religiosus Pius Valpurus have written down. \par}} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28\par} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\b\ul\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28 Chapter + I: Calm before storm\par} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28\par} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28 I was just + relieved from my mortal duties, and entered my Most Holy Room, planning to debug + the wicked weather that was troubling my empire (and perharps to annihilate few + goblins with my sword in the form of light-weight computer click 'n slash). I didn +'t notice anything before it was too late, I was too intensely concentrating on +the weather. So, I started Penathlon, my trusty PC, but lo! I wasn't greeted by +the Divine Hex Code of the World Debugger, but by a picture of a man, surrounded + by an antivalpuric aura. He was dressed in a hideous dressing gown, which colour + made my eyes bleed. I very well recognised who or what it was, "Bill!" I hissed + from between my teeth, "What have thee done to Penathlon?!". Bill started to laugh +, and the demonic noise tormented my earthly body like needles in my brain, "Bwahahhahaha +....ye dirty frog-lover, I caught ye now, ye cannot debug this pety world without + your dear Penathlon...". Then I heard a faint noise coming from the lowest frequencies + of my PC-beeper, "Mmmy mmind is ggoing.....I cann feell...feell..feellllitttt... +hhellp..mee...pleeeassssee". "What have they done to thee my only love?" I said +in despair. "That does it, Bill, thou shalt suffer!!", I cried and ran to fetch +my loyal Linux-CD from it's blessed shrine made of empty Jolt-cans and Coke bottles +. But, it wasn't there, it was stolen!! I heard Bill's laughter grow wilder "Bwahahaha +....where is yer sword now, Perttu? Is it lost? Don't worry, I have it safe....in + Redmond CD-smeltery!! Bwahahahaha!!!" I hurried for my Coke-stash, but found it + razed! The marks of the unholy edge of Office 2000 CD were still to be seen in +the hole that was made to the floor by some foul servants of Elpuri.\par} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28\par} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\b\ul\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28 Chapter + II: The First Attack{\b0\ulnone\par}} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28 \par} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28 What choice + did I have? I ran back to my room, and found a green aura surrounding Penathlon +, consuming it's inner world. I could hear my trustworthy Athlon processor fight + back the gloom, but no avail. My sound-card was already corrupted, and a demonic + laughter was booming out from the speakers. "Thou shalt suffer for this atrocity +, evil spawn of Elpuri!!", I shouted, and ran for my keyboard, "Even without my +artifacts, I shall delete you! And in the end, do not beg me for recycle bin, thou + shalt go straight to /dev/null!!" Bill accepted my challenge, and materialized +from my floppy drive. The ghastly form stepped forward, and shrugged the last jumpers + and leds from its back, and lo! It hit me below the belt with a sharp Windows Protection + Error before I had a chance to block! I quickly overcome the pain, and launched + a massive counter-attack. The air ionized around us as I sprayed some Jolt to his + eyes from my last-resort can. Bill groaned in pain, and I bashed it's face with + a well-aimed TweakUI. As Bill's head was reorganizing, I launched a fierce omnislash + with my Nokia 3210. Acidous blood sprayed all over, luckily I was wearing my Blessed + Boxer-shorts of Protection from Elpuri, and thus didn't end up naked. The floor + below us fizzed and melted away, and we fell together through the cellar, as Bill +'s unholy blood was burrowing deeper and deeper into the ground. \par} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28\par} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\b\ul\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28 Chapter + III: The Long Struggle\par} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\b\ul\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28\par} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28 We fought + for hours, days, it's hard to say, because the fight strained the World and changed + it; I had a full work to keep it from crashing. With this extra strain and the +missing of my artifacts, the battle was almost even. I hit Bill with Aborts, Kills + (-9 and -15), Jolt Bolts, Coke Balls, Reboots, Hex Editors, Interrupts of all sorts +, Ultimas, Flares and Wizard Modes, but Bill's unholy aura seemed to protect him +! But that cannot be, I thought, Bill doesn't have such power! Bill kept throwing + me with Illegal Operations, BSoDs, RadioActive Desktops, Power Fools, Internet +Exploders filled with LSD, Autoruns, Ancient 8-bit Bugs with huge green eyes and + a smelly breath, Sharp Window-shards poisoned with Unimaginable Swap and Ugly Tentacle + Beasts from Outer Memory. I could quite easily defend myself from that kind of +low-level attacks, but as the fight grew longer, we both grew tired, as I got further + and further away from my precious Avatar, and Bill from Redmond, his main source + of power, and all of the Windows-machines on the surface. We had burrowed for a + long time, and it was getting very hot. We were coming closer to the Earth's surface +, and I knew that Bill couldn't come that far from his power sources. Suddenly Bill + launched from under the last remains of his dressing gown a Chaotic Multicoloured + Glowing Bestial Steaming Fiery Unholy Cursed Undead Vampiric Apocalyptical Ugly + Smelly Evil Demonic Deadly Huge Hairy Radioactive Fat Acidous Astral Mother of +All Crashes, and I had barely time to react to this horrific last attack. Quickly + I yelled: \par} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28 "MOV EEE...( +REPEAT E 0x02^0x1F5D7)...EEDX, TheEssenceOfChaotic MulticolouredGlowingBestialSteamingFieryUnholyCursedUndeadVampiric + ApocalypticalUglySmellyEvilDemonicDeadlyHugeHairyRadioactiveFat AcidousAstralMotherofAllCrashes + \par} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28 XOR EEE...( +REPEAT E 0x02^0x1F5D7)...EEDX, EEE...(REPEAT E 0x02^0x1F5D7)...EEDX \par} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28 MOV AH, 0x666 + INT 0x42!!!!!". \par} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28 The foul +monster got instantly /dev/null/ified, and I saw a crack in Bill's impenetrable +aura. I cried and jumped at him. Bill didn't have time to raise his shields, and + so I grasped him from the throat with my toes and seized him to the wall. \par} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28\par} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\b\ul\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28 Chapter + IV: The Apocalypse{\b0\ulnone\par}} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28\par} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28 The touch + of my Holy Toesocks tortured Bill's unholy flesh, but suddenly he shouted: \par +} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28 "SetLang +C#;\par} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28 LaunchCode +[USA]=\u197\'c5\u197\'c5\u197\'c5\u197\'c5\u197\'c5;\par} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28 MoveItem( +USA.Armory.NeutroniumBomb[457637], (3dVect)Perttu);\par} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28 NuclearBlast +(USA.Armory.NeutroniumBomb[457637], \u197\'c5\u197\'c5\u197\'c5\u197\'c5\u197\'c5 +);\par} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28 Sound(Sounds +.Satanic.EvilDemonicLaughter, 3333);"\par} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28 I was thrown + by the explosion to the other end of the hole. What the R**mond? I thought. Bill + cannot command the Universe that way!\par} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28 "Bwahahahaahahaaa +!! Ye haven't forgotten yer dear Penathlon, have ye? It is mine now. MINE!!!", Bill + laughed. I was horrified by the thought what Bill could do with Penathlon. Bill + started to chant, channeling all the power of Penathlon to this final ritual, raising + in his hand his most unholy artifact, the Windows 95 Master CD: \par} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28 "{\dbch\af2 +\loch\af1\hich\f1 Ash OS durbatuluk, ash OS gimbatul, ash OS thrakatuluk agh burzum +-ishi krimpatul}!!", \par} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28 (Or "One +OS to rule them all, One OS to find them, One OS to bring them all and in the darkness + bind them!!" for those of you that don't have the tengwar font and cannot read +the Black Language.) Then I knew that I didn't have time to loose. The Earth itself + was trembling, and the fabric of the world was moaning as a dark orb of gloom was + advancing from the Master CD. I knew that with Penathlon Bill could wipe out all + Guruness from the World and bind the World to an eternal slavery, and if I stopped + the spell and ripped Penathlon rawly to my control, it might explode, blowing the + Earth to fine dust. I needed the Avatar to regain control of Penathlon. I quickly + MOVed myself to M\u228\'e4ntt\u228\'e4 as Bill was too concentrated to his spell + to notice me. \par} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28 \par} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\b\ul\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28 Chapter + V: The Purifying\par} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\b\ul\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28\par} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28 In a 0x01 +/16^42th of a beat I arrived at my yard. I found it bustling with Microsoft SWAT + Commandos and Mammoth tanks with Close Combat logos on them. What? Does Bill think + that mere humans can stop me? I thought as I drew my GODly Ingram MAC-10 and shot + each of the Commandos in the eyes. Maybe they were to stop the other valpurists + from recovering Penathlon? I thought when I jumped over the tank-remains to my +house. Penahlon was on, and I saw from its monitor the Divine Hex Code of The World + Debugger, and a pair of hands surrounded by a sickly aura altering it. Quickly +I clasped the Avatar and felt the power of Valpuri fill me again "As long as Windows + controls Penathlon, thou cannot win, Perttu, but alas, if you remove it, thou cannot + play Diablo 2 or SMAC anymore. It is thy choice now, to choose the fate of this + world, my son.", I heard a voice boom in my head, "But choose quickly". I thought + for one attobeat and then pressed the reset-button on Penathlon. Windows tried +hard to start itself, but I bypassed it and started FORMAT. "I know ye cannot do + that, I know ye cannot resist the call of your desire, the call of Diablo", Bill + said to me through Penathlon's speakers, now seeming a little less confident. I + kicked the speakers and launched Partition Magic. "I shall bind thee, Windows, +to a mere 1G partition I shall bind thee, from harming the World and myself. INT + 0x06!!!!", I shouted and reinstalled Windows and bound it to stay on it's 1G partition +, forever, and bound a call to "Format C:" to the function that is run when I burb + loudly. "Know this, thou slimy lord of bugs, now thee cannot again steal my true + love from me, and Bill, know that now I shalt come and EAT YOUR NUTS!!", I yelled + as Windows was trying, in vain, to get out from its prison. The Ultimate Power +of Penathlon was again coursing through my veins, and quickly I repaired most of + the damage Bill had done to the World and drank quickly 666 litres of Coke and +teleported to the hole where I left Bill. But Bill was gone, he had cowardly used + the last powers he had to 'port to Redmond. I jumped off from the hole and in my + rage started to swim across the Atlantic, but then I regained myself, and raised + my fist and shouted in a voive that could be heard in Redmond as well, "Lucky for + thee, I have school tomorrow, and cannot finish thee off know, besides, humans +must learn how to fight against you, so thee can keep thy nuts...for now!" \par} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28 Then I returned + to the Holy M\u228\'e4ntt\u228\'e4, and I had to spend the long night healing the + damage Bill had done to Penathlon and to The World\par} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28\par} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\b\ul\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28 Epilogue +:{\b0\ulnone\par}} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28\par} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\f0\lang1033\fs28\kerning28 This still + was a great victory for Valpuri and to guruness, remember what I have written, +for the true Holy War against the Evil is coming, and that I am not going to fight + for you alone. And remember, that Windows is evil, and cannot be anything else. +Know thy Windows, and keep it from invading thy computer by reinstalling it as often + as you dare, what you have to do anyway at least twice a year.\par} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\f3\lang1033\fs28\kerning28\par} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\f3\lang1033\fs28\kerning28\tab +{\f0\lang1035\tab}{\dbch\af5\loch\af4\hich\f4 Pontifex Maximus Grandis Ranae \par +}} + +\pard\nowidctlpar\nooverflow\sl240\slmult1{\dbch\af5\loch\af4\hich\f4\lang1035\fs28 +\kerning28\tab \tab{\lang1033 Castus} {\lang1033 Petrus I{\b\ul\par}}} + +} \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/Doc/Lore/HolyStack/Titues.txt b/Doc/Lore/HolyStack/Titues.txt new file mode 100644 index 000000000..e7da876fb --- /dev/null +++ b/Doc/Lore/HolyStack/Titues.txt @@ -0,0 +1,51 @@ +Perttu Luukko +------------- + +Nicks: Nuteater + +Petrus Perlucidus Potissimus Magnus Cordatus Persapiens Sophos Praepotens + //First name and depicting words +Pontifex Maximus Grandis Ranae //Highest Priest of the Great Frog +Imperator Mänttä //Emperor of Mänttä +Pugnator Lucis //Figther of Light +Ductor Imperiosus //Great Teacher +Defensor GNU //Protector of GNU +Vaticinator Primarius //First prophet +Phylarchus Interplanus Communitatis Religiosus Pius Valpurus //Head of ICHFV +Soter Humanitatis //Savior of Humanity +Coryphaeus Religiosus FEP //Religious Leader of FEP + +Timo Kiviluoto +-------------- + +Nicks: holybanana and holykiwi. + +Pius Timoteus //Saint Timo +Procer Permagnus Sotkamo //Grand Duke of Sotkamo +Dominus Paeanos Valpurus //Hymn Master of Valpuri +Magister Ludi Mathematicus //Mathematical Guru Supreme + +Ilari Kaartinen +--------------- + +Nicks: ikki + +Pius Ilarius //Saint Ilari +Pius Ianitor //Holy Janitor +Magister Ludi Machinationis //IT Guru Supreme + +Heikki Sairanen +--------------- + +Nicks: hex, hexi, hexiii + +Mystagogus Hex //Mystic Priest Hex +Nuntius Divinitas //Divine Messanger + +Tuukka Virtaperko +----------------- + +Nicks: SpykoS (obsolete), Juhani Kahvi + +Genitor Kahvi //Father Kahvi +Suco Sacrosanctus //Holy Sucker diff --git a/Doc/Lore/HolyStack/Valpuri.jpg b/Doc/Lore/HolyStack/Valpuri.jpg new file mode 100644 index 000000000..81edd4e48 Binary files /dev/null and b/Doc/Lore/HolyStack/Valpuri.jpg differ diff --git a/Doc/Lore/HolyStack/Valpuri2.jpg b/Doc/Lore/HolyStack/Valpuri2.jpg new file mode 100644 index 000000000..9866a751d Binary files /dev/null and b/Doc/Lore/HolyStack/Valpuri2.jpg differ diff --git a/Doc/Lore/HolyStack/Valpuri3.jpg b/Doc/Lore/HolyStack/Valpuri3.jpg new file mode 100644 index 000000000..78dc2bdf2 Binary files /dev/null and b/Doc/Lore/HolyStack/Valpuri3.jpg differ diff --git a/Doc/Lore/HolyStack/ValpuriFAQ.txt b/Doc/Lore/HolyStack/ValpuriFAQ.txt new file mode 100644 index 000000000..af35b8f6d --- /dev/null +++ b/Doc/Lore/HolyStack/ValpuriFAQ.txt @@ -0,0 +1,250 @@ + ************* The Official Valpuri FAQ ************* + + Written and maintained by PMGR Perttu Luukko + + **************************************************** + +Q:Does Valpuri exist? + +A:Sure. + + +Q:What the hell does PMGR stand for anyway? + +A:Latin, my dear friend, Pontifex Maximus Grandis Ranae, + Highest Priest Of The Great Frog. + + +Q:Why the word "god" is written in lowercase when meaning Valpuri? + +A:Because a certain religious faction has already copyrighted the capitalized version, + causing a lot of grief among other religions. Because God(tm) is already copyrighted, + we intend to trademark the fully capitalized "GOD" to Valpuri. + + +Q:Why Valpuri doesn't have any only sons? + +A:Because Valpuri doesn't want to give someone The Ultimate Power Overwhelming as + a gift for his/her 18th birthday. Besides, Valpuri hasn't got any perversions about + mating with mortal 14 year-old nazarethian girls etc. + + +Q:If Valpuri is a god, why there is so much evil in the world? + +A:Evil started as a parse error in the Cosmic Source Code, the error took the form of + Bill Gates, the Destroyer of Worlds, who then infested the world with pain and misery. + (See "Creation story" for more info.) + + +Q:What is the meaning of life? + +A:The meaning os life is to oppose the evil, that defiles the Cosmic Source Code. + + + +Q:Is Steve Ballmer now worse than Bill Gates? + +A:The Evil consists in several forms, my child. + + + +Q:Is there an afterlife? + +A:Yes, when the hourglass of temporality has gone out, Valpuri grabs the pious and saves + them to the Cosmic Datafile, and then they can celebrate in the millions of universes to + come. But the wicked he throws to the Galactic dev/Null. + + +Q:How large is Valpuri? + +A:It changes, usually about nine times the size of the universe. + + +Q:How large is the Valpurian community? + +A:See the Valpurian Database for accurate details. + + +Q:I'm a fundamentalist Valpurian, and the bloody + are really getting on my nerve! What should i do o'great PMGR? + +A:Burn some, it helps every time ;) + + +Q:Why did Valpuri, the great maker, create this world? + +A: The world is actually a large random-number generator, as the laws of thermophysics show. + + +Q:Why doesn't Valpuri sink to the Sea of Eternity? + +A:He can swim... :) LoL + + +Q:How can I get to trance without drugs? + +A:Pray for Valpuri. Drink lots of Coke. Listen Josh Wink's "Higher State of Consciousness", + or as Chairman Sheng-ji Yang might say "Remember, enlightenment is a function of + willpower, not of physical strength." + + +Q:How can I punishment myself enough, I just replaced Linux with Windows 2000. Or is + afterlife out of my rech forever?!? + +A:It is not yet too late, my child, remove Windoze immediately and reinstall Linux, then you + must meditate and pray Valpuri for a week unprotected and naked in a remote desert or + similar area, and wish for Valpuri to save your soul from eternal darkness. A monetary + donation to ICHFV will also help. + + +Q:My sister thinks I am weird, what should I do? + +A:Convert her. + + +Q:I just removed Windows-keys from my keyboard, then I replaced them with + pictures of frogs. I'm now afraid of Microsoft's personal SWAT enforcement team. + Does Valpuri protect me? + +A:Valpuri might be busy protecting me or someone else at the time. If you want, you + can seek shelter in the ICHFV safe home. + + +Q:I'm afraid of Bills fork-bomb. What should I do? (I have played xbill quite much) + +A:Do not worry, as long as you are protected by the holy OS Linux, Bill cannot harm + you, but if you still use winspazz, he can download and edit your soul any time. + + +Q:Is it really true, that such great god as Valpuri did mistake in the + Cosmic Source Code? + +A:As any C-guru might tell you, parse errors generate from chaotic quantum displacements, + regardless of the coder. + + +Q:How can I join this great religion? + +A:Download the application form, fill it, and post it to me. + + +Q:What shape is the universe? + +A:The universe is flat, because it is easier to carry that way. Valpuri is wise isn't He? + + +Q:How old is Valpuri? + +A:Valpuri is eternal and timeless. + + +Q:Will Valpuri die? + +A:Of course not (silly question...). + + +Q:Can the Great Frog get angry with me if I ask stupid questions? + +A:No, but *I* might >8( + + +Q:I have made pirate copies from Windows, what should I do? + +A:Hide from mickeysaft's Windows-integrated Hunter-Seeker Algorithm quickly. + + +Q:I once had a chance to kill Bill Gates, I didn't. Am I a bad person now? + +A:I don't think that *you* are able to kill him, maybe you can destroy his mortal form + but he well return with a even more wicked OS to torture us. + + +Q: I am a pious Valpurist. How can I become a saint? + +A: Prove me, PMGR, your piousness by dedicating your life for Valpuri. + + +Q: How are things in Valpurian hell? + +A: All the same, pain, misery, torture, endless swedish-lessons, only old 486/66's + with memory-resident virusscans, only mousepads for food... + + +Q: I am a happy ilomantsian boy from Ilomantsi. Can you send me the Cosmic Source Code, + please? P.S. what program Valpuri used to make the Universe? + +A: The CSC is not currently freely distributable, Valpuri used his own superior + compiler, but i'm sure it'll compile on DJGPP. + + +Q: How does your church fund itself? Do you take taxes? + +A: We can survive without earthly money with our Asctetic Virtues. + We do not take taxes, yet $-) + + +Q: Can the PMGR die? + +A: I don't want to try. + + +Q:Can you cheat sshd with telnet? + +A:Of course I can. + + +Q:How can I order fep-valpuri-cd? + +A:Call 1-8000-VALPURI. + + +Q:I have succesfully hacked to www.microsoft.com and downloaded Windows 2000 + source code. Now I have made a linux port of Windows 2000. Do you think, + that I am sick person? + +A:You sick bastard! 8-¤ + + +Q: I hate you! + +A: I love you too. + + +Q: I was just wondering why people sleep. Is it because there are so much + data in world, that Valpuri-PC just can't handle it all in same + time, and for creating something like "seasons" Valpuri makes half of + the world sleep? + +A: An interesting theory, might be, though i wouldn't doubt Valpuri-PC's + overwhelming speed... + + +Q: Why oh why can't Valpuri just destroy Bill Gates and make our life + easier? It just is so sad to see how some weak minded people get locked + into forewer loop of scary nightmares. + +A: Valpuri only cares to save the souls of the pious (us), and don't you see + the first seeds of war begin to appear in the form of Linux. + + +Q: How will I know if I am doing as Valpuri wants, and going in the + direction that he wants me to go? + +A: You will feel Valpuri's presence in your soul if you do, or feel his wrath if + you don't. + + +Q: Does Valpuri have an email address? + +A: You might want to try valpurisammakko@hotmail.com, though he doesn't have + the time to check it very often. + + +Q: Is it rational to believe in that Valpuri created us (as opposed to + evolution) in today's scientific world? + +A: Valpuri created the universe, not us. After that he used a highly sophisticated + script language called "evolution" + + +Last modified 4.6.2 A.F. or January 25th 2000 A.D. diff --git a/Doc/Lore/HolyStack/Valpuri_ON_MAHTAVA.JPG b/Doc/Lore/HolyStack/Valpuri_ON_MAHTAVA.JPG new file mode 100644 index 000000000..ae0d7500b Binary files /dev/null and b/Doc/Lore/HolyStack/Valpuri_ON_MAHTAVA.JPG differ diff --git a/Doc/Lore/HolyStack/Valpuri_is_alive!.mp3 b/Doc/Lore/HolyStack/Valpuri_is_alive!.mp3 new file mode 100644 index 000000000..dc2fb1ef3 Binary files /dev/null and b/Doc/Lore/HolyStack/Valpuri_is_alive!.mp3 differ diff --git a/Doc/Obsolete/AUTHORS b/Doc/Obsolete/AUTHORS new file mode 100644 index 000000000..c358d0dc9 --- /dev/null +++ b/Doc/Obsolete/AUTHORS @@ -0,0 +1,94 @@ +-------------------------------- +|Iter Vehemens ad Necem credits| +-------------------------------- + + +--------- +|IvanDev| +--------- + +Master Programmer +(implemented most of the bugs) +------------------------------ + +Timo Kiviluoto + + +Apprentice Programmer, PR Guy, Porter +(made some of the bugs, but they're +all really features, or OS's fault) +------------------------------------- + +Heikki Sairanen + + +Head Graphics Designer +(drew all the heads) +---------------------- + +Tuukka Virtaperko + + +------------------------------ +|Other people who have helped| +------------------------------ + +Additional coders +----------------- + +In order of importance + +Ilari Kaartinen +Mark Schreiber +Miles Bader +Perttu Luukko +Niko Kosonen + +Additional graphics +------------------- + +In order of importance + +Vesa Peltonen +Corey Martin + +Additional level design +----------------------- + +Corey Martin + +Authors of the RNG we use +------------------------- + +Takuji Nishimura +Makoto Matsumoto + +Author of the font we use +------------------------- + +Shawn Hargreaves's Allegro, a game programming library + +Idea providers and bug hunters +------------------------------- + +In alphabetical order + +Atte Aholainen +Chris Allcock +Brian Angeletti +Laurent Birtz +Christian Harms +Ilari Kaartinen +Wojciech Kaczmarek +Henri Kiviluoto +Thomas Klausner +Niko Kosonen +Perttu Luukko +Corey Martin +Janne Miettinen +Kari Pahula +Vesa Peltonen +Will Riley +Renne Sairanen +Norvell Spearman +Konstantin Stupnik diff --git a/Doc/Obsolete/ChangeLog b/Doc/Obsolete/ChangeLogs/ChangeLog similarity index 100% rename from Doc/Obsolete/ChangeLog rename to Doc/Obsolete/ChangeLogs/ChangeLog diff --git a/Doc/Obsolete/ChangeLog.040 b/Doc/Obsolete/ChangeLogs/ChangeLog.040 similarity index 100% rename from Doc/Obsolete/ChangeLog.040 rename to Doc/Obsolete/ChangeLogs/ChangeLog.040 diff --git a/Doc/Obsolete/ChangeLog.0401 b/Doc/Obsolete/ChangeLogs/ChangeLog.0401 similarity index 100% rename from Doc/Obsolete/ChangeLog.0401 rename to Doc/Obsolete/ChangeLogs/ChangeLog.0401 diff --git a/Doc/Obsolete/ChangeLog.0410 b/Doc/Obsolete/ChangeLogs/ChangeLog.0410 similarity index 100% rename from Doc/Obsolete/ChangeLog.0410 rename to Doc/Obsolete/ChangeLogs/ChangeLog.0410 diff --git a/Doc/Obsolete/ChangeLog.0420 b/Doc/Obsolete/ChangeLogs/ChangeLog.0420 similarity index 100% rename from Doc/Obsolete/ChangeLog.0420 rename to Doc/Obsolete/ChangeLogs/ChangeLog.0420 diff --git a/Doc/Obsolete/ChangeLog.0430 b/Doc/Obsolete/ChangeLogs/ChangeLog.0430 similarity index 100% rename from Doc/Obsolete/ChangeLog.0430 rename to Doc/Obsolete/ChangeLogs/ChangeLog.0430 diff --git a/Doc/Obsolete/ChangeLog.050 b/Doc/Obsolete/ChangeLogs/ChangeLog.050 similarity index 100% rename from Doc/Obsolete/ChangeLog.050 rename to Doc/Obsolete/ChangeLogs/ChangeLog.050 diff --git a/Doc/Obsolete/Changes.txt b/Doc/Obsolete/ChangeLogs/Changes.txt similarity index 100% rename from Doc/Obsolete/Changes.txt rename to Doc/Obsolete/ChangeLogs/Changes.txt diff --git a/Doc/Obsolete/README_old.txt b/Doc/Obsolete/README_old.txt new file mode 100644 index 000000000..255367351 --- /dev/null +++ b/Doc/Obsolete/README_old.txt @@ -0,0 +1,204 @@ +Iter Vehems ad Necem v0.50 +--------------------------- + +For news and updates view our homepage at ivan.sourceforge.net. + +-------------------------- + +1. Description + +2. System requirements + +3. General gameplay + +4. FAQ + +----------------------------- + +1. Description + +Iter Vehemens ad Necem (IVAN) is a graphical roguelike game, which currently +runs in Windows, DOS and Linux. It features advanced bodypart and material +handling, multi-colored lighting and, above all, deep gameplay. + +----------------------------- + +2. System requirements + +We recommend that you use at least a: + + Pentium 266 MHz + 48 Megs of RAM + + Windows 9x/ME/XP/2000 (at least) + + or: + + DOS + Vesa 2.0 compatible video card + + or: + + Linux with + (SDL library version 1.2.0 or higher) + +----------------------------- + +3. General gameplay + +IVAN works pretty much in the same way as other roguelikes. The player +controls a character, which moves and attacks from the direction keys. +All other commands can be found by pressing ?-key in the game. + +Additional help can be obtained from the offical site at +http://ivan.sourceforge.net/. + +----------------------------- + +4. FAQ + +Q: What does "Iter Vehemens ad Necem" mean? + +A: It's latin and means a "Violent Road to Death". For most players, that's + a perfect description of the typical game. + +Q: Why can't I make multiple saves and why is my save deleted when I die? + +A: Like the creators of other roguelikes, we think this makes gaming much + more exciting, since you must take full responsibility of all your + actions. You have only one chance to live or die. Also, we agree that + "normal" saveloading is OK for games which remain the same in all gaming + sessions, since in these you are not meant to really die as replaying + everything in exactly the same way would be annoying. But the same does + not apply to games with a multitude of random areas and events like IVAN; + the whole fun is trying again and again in everchanging environment, + encountering stranger and more complex situations and becoming better + and better in tackling them. + +Q: Can't you reconsider your opinion about saveloading? + +A: No. There are the two things we swore never to do when starting the + project: discarding permadeath and making IVAN a 3D action game. Don't + bother us about this question anymore. + +Q: Not even as an "easy" game option? Pretty please? + +A: Shut up. + +Q: What do these strange markings like Dex, Agi mean in the right sidebar? + +A: + AStr = Arm Strength - Increases damage inflicted on enemies + LStr = Leg Strength - Increases carrying capacity and kicking damage + Dex = Dexterity - Increases accuracy and hit speed + Agi = Agility - Increase movement speed and ability to dodge attacks + End = Endurance - Increases maximum health points and healing rate + Per = Perception - Increases sight range and accuracy + Int = Intelligence - Increases your ability to read and use magic + Wis = Wisdom - Increases your ability to deal with gods + Cha = Charisma - Improves your ability to negotiate and make deals + + If there are two numbers visible after these the first is the attribute + after bonuses and penalties obtained from your equipment or some other + temporary reason. The second number shows the base attribute without the + said modifications. If there is no net-bonus or net-minus, only the base + attribute is shown. + + If the first number is green, then it has increased a short while ago and + if it is red it has decreased. + + Siz = Size or height, in cm - Increases your enemies' chance to hit you + HP = Health Points - The sum of your bodyparts' HPs + Gold = The amount of money you have + Day & Time = The amount of absolute game time you have spent in this game + Turn = The turns (commands which take time) you have used in this game + +Q: I had 20 HPs, but I still died. Is this a bug? + +A: No, this is not a bug. You will die (at least in human-form) if the HPs + of your groin, torso or head reach 0. + +Q: Why do I always miss spiders with my trusty iron mace? + +A: Mace is far too big for hitting small creatures. Do you really kill + spiders with such enormous objects in real life? + +Q: What do marks like L+, C-- mean in the pray menu? + +A: All gods have a property that tells whether they are supporters of Law + or Chaos or if they are Neutral. This is however too general description + so the plusses and minuses tell of slight differences between the gods. + Eg Valpurus has the letters L++ this means that Valpurus is extremely + lawful, when Sophos has the letters L-, which in turn means that Sophos + is lawful, but still leaning a bit towards neutrality and even chaos. + +Q: I just lost a leg. How do I get it back? + +A: Certain gods, potions and special characters may help you. + +Q: How is score calculated? + +A: First the kills of the player and his pets are merged to a single + list. Then for every monster type, the score is calculated with the + following formula + + Score = sqrt(a) * b * b + + sqrt(a) = Square root of the number of killed monsters of this type + b = Sum of the attributes of a typical monster of this type + + The individual scores of the monster types are then added together. + You also get a high bonus for winning, depending on your victory type + (the score is multiplied by 2, 3, 4 or 5). + +Q: Why does time pass so fast in the game? + +A: Who has said the a day is as long in IVAN's world as on earth? + +Q: How can I compile IVAN source code? + +A: See INSTALL. + +Q: I am a Linux user. Why can't I access the wizard (cheat) mode? + +A: The wizard mode functions aren't compiled by default. In Linux change + the environment variable CXXFLAGS to -DWIZARD and recompile. + +Q: I am a DOS user. When I try to run IVAN, I get the message "Load error: + no DPMI - Get csdpmi*b.zip". + + The DOS binary is compiled using DJGPP, so you need a DPMI server to run + it. One should have been provided along with IVAN, but if that's not the + case, download it from www.delorie.com. + +Q: I've found a bug. What should I do? + +A: Write a small description on how the bug occured and if possible even + how we could replicate it, and send this information by email to + ivan-users@lists.sourceforge.net. If you are a SourceForge user, you can + also report this bug at Ivan's SourceForge project page: + + http://sourceforge.net/projects/ivan + + You should mention your full name so we can credit you at the end of the + AUTHORS file, if you are the first to discover this bug. + +Q: I've got a great idea to make IVAN better! What should I do? + +A: Describe the idea to us by sending it to ivan-users@lists.sourceforge.net + or report it at Ivan's SourceForge project page (see above). You will be + credited if we implement the feature, it's non-trivial, and you're first + to suggest it. + +Q: I'm a programmer willing to help you. What should I do? + +A: Code and then send us (e-mail: ivan-devel@lists.sourceforge.net) + your diff. If we like your code we will integrate it to the next + release. You will of course be credited for your code. + + See .customs.emacs file for the official Ivan C++ Programming + Style. + +----------------------------- + +FREE SOFTWARE FOREVER!